unforgettable

2008-11-04T18:48:00.001+08:00

hey hey! very long never blog already.

i just kinda think that i cannot blog for nuts. LOL!

besides.... as though no one reads it... so yar....

LOLx....

2008-06-14T05:05:00.002+08:00

I kinda feel good today, but a bit tarnished by my brother's comment.

I slept at 8 in the morning and forced myself to go see my results at noon. Pretty scared then, because my papers weren't well done, except macroecons. I expected it to get around B.... but... sigh. But one of the subject, which i never go to his classes, got B worh... and i thought i gonna get C or something. Kinda happy about it. Well, at least i pass. Hehe

Then i went back to sleep... till 4... i guess.
And then i went to spend my time on my own, watch shows and other stuff. Then went to help my parents.

Today dunno why... like having waves and waves of people coming in. Don't know when and where these people come from. Good thing, God has His own timing. We do finish one thing, another group then come. At least we get to rest. Hehe.

After that, we went to Malaysia to have supper... for me, its dinner. Well, it is then that my brother commented that his girlfriend is more useful than me in the durian stall. Wells, i feel i really have no use in the stall. But i feel that she is even more no use than me....
Good thing that I am not going to be the one who is gonna to take over the business. As long its them, i think this statement will only be available when i recognise her as one who is more capable than me. Afterall, these past 18 years I have been nagged by my parents to help them. Whereas, she is too protective by my bro to let me recognise her as one.

if she really after her work and come down to work for my parents, i think she pretty much deserve what my mother is gonna give her. As well as, if she is really gonna work for my parents, i 'bu ke qi', ask her do the jobs she ought to do.

I seriously think that our relationship is turning sour because of some external factors. i'm pretty worried that if one day when we are old, our relationship is cold and 'not a family anymore'... sigh...

God, I pray you help in our decisions in our lives to lead towards You. Amen :D

2008-06-07T04:02:00.004+08:00

I was thinking of whether to take up what course at what school.
Together with that, I was thinking of whether to study overseas.

I guess my answer to whether I want to study overseas is NO.
And why so?

I think one obvious thing is about my parents. They have already slogged 6 years of their life to support my sister in her studies in Australia. Plus, they have to cough out their blood to work extra harder during the 6 years she was there. Not only so, they are taking out all their savings for it. Every year at least 50,000 bucks... not a small number.
I guess, an exchange program would be a better option to cover the 'studying overseas' option.

Secondly, even though I think I can leave my family and go study overseas, maybe get a foreign boyfriend, and maybe marry there, I don't think I can leave church easily.
Afterall, I want to serve in church more than I want to study. However, this results to whether God wants me to serve in church or elsewhere. And it is a subject to when and how as well.
God always have his plan behind all my plans. No matter what I want that doesn't parallel with what He wants, He would strike it all off. Just like then, that I want to go Australia.
When I had everything prepared, and just waiting to finish exams, and just go, God suddenly pops up problems with me and the guardian.
No matter what, God also opened options for me - private schools. So now I am following the route of private schools because I cannot go to public universities in Singapore!

And another reason is because, if I can study in Singapore, what for I go study overseas? It's gonna be a waste of money and time. If private school can provide me a good certification and a fast route, what for I need to spend double the time and triple the amount to go? LOL.

2008-06-07T03:25:00.008+08:00

What is your opinion of friendship?
To me, friendship is something so precious that I really appreciate, especially those that I have ran together with them.

One of this group would be my npcc friends, those who are friends with me for about 6 years now. These are the people who knows me, yet, not all about me.
For an instance, there's one who actually mistakenly thinks that I am siding another friend in their conflict. But the rest of us all can clearly see. There is a chinese idiom, 'Those who are in the situation can only see things that are happening now. But those who are outside of the situation can see the whole issue of what is going on.'
Just like, you are watching a track and field competition. If you are running a course, you can only see what is in front of you, and have to really concentrate on what is in front of you. On the contrary, if you are a spectator, you can see the whole stadium, and see who is the first to who is the last in the race.
I guess, this is something that we must all understand.
If two are in conflict, please do not also judge those who are outside of the conflict. Even you think that we are siding the person, let not your heart turn cold towards us. We are not siding. If it is one, maybe... yes. But look, it's the whole group. Obviously the situation shows clearly.

No matter what, we all wish that you guys can really patch up. As well as, the rest of us wants you to continue to be friends with us.

2008-06-07T02:57:00.005+08:00

I guess its been so long since i blogged.

Some updates:

1) I just finished my diploma, so now i am waiting for my certificate so that i can apply somewhere else.

2) I cannot tell you what route i have decided coz i have not decide on anything... thats bad.

3) I got re-affirmed in March, Easter '08. This is one big decision that i've made and its correct. LOL.

4) I am now, still a big fat pig and have not saved any cash in my bank, because i have been a big spender and have problems with the banks i am with. How irritating.

And i guess.... that's all for now. :D

2008-02-22T15:15:00.002+08:00

Hello. Its coming to the end second month of they year 2008.
I feel that i have not accomplished anything that i wanted. *SLAP SLAP*

Things didn't start out well this year. So many unhappy things have happened. But looking at the brighter side of life, you can say that, at least everyday you wake up, you can see the sky. Every minute you breathe in, is air and not acid.

My friend Tammy is back from Sydney. Finally we get to meet after.... around 5 years.
We talked quite a number of times over the net, chat a number of times over the phone, seen each other on pictures.
Finally one day in january, she told me that she's gonna come back to singapore in december.
But, she came back yesterday, not december. She came back for the funeral of her grandmother.

Not a happy event to see each other. But, i believe, that it is time that we show what is the Bethany family spirit. A lot of us decided that we go to the vigil service to support her. No matter in tears or smiles, all of us are willing to give her our hugs and tissues. Haha. Maybe for me, is my tee shirt, because i don't bring tissues all around.

Its time that, we, as a batch, go testify of our faith to our fellow batch-mate.

Friends, it's indeed time to show our love and regard for God.

2008-01-01T22:01:00.000+08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Well, haven't been posting, i am sure that many of you have been wondering where have i been. LOL.
What can i say then? I can only say that God have been preserving my life and made my life fruitful. Especially at this period of time. In youth conference. Hehe.
In camp, i learn this new song name 'in every day that dawns'. And this sentence, 'as my life unfolds, you are revealing the wisdom of Your sovereign plan' becomes very close to my heart. Why so?
I remember at the beginning of the year i wanted to walk in my own ways, wanting to pursue my own dreams. But God said something and slap my face with it. Not literally slapping. But just have me a wake up call. He said, 'My ways are not your ways.' and He really made sure i cannot go aust. Sounds nasty isn't it? But now everything seems clear. He wants me to stay because of a greater plan here. What is the greater plan that i am talking about? It is to be His servant. And nothing is greater than that.
What is my resolution for the new year? Mind you. This is the first resolution i ever make. So bear with me. Lets just make 10.
1) to study the Lord's Word in a deeper level, and stressing myself to go to the extent to learn more.
2) to get higher grades for studies, for the sake of glorifying the Lord's name.
3) since i want to glorify Lord, i should lose weight. Say, 10 kg by june . This is also because i want to take care of the body of temple that God gave to me.
4) to love the Lord's house even more, and to clean up every week as i can.
5) to go for all the church meetings, classes, and sessions, as much as i can.
6) to save at least quater of my allowance to my savings. And NOT spending it.
7) to listen more and talk less.
8) to share my faith to at least 1 person. I never try before. Lol.
9) to study the Lord's Word at least 5 times a week, excluding all church activities, meeting, sessions, and classes.
10) and finally, to learn to be a prayerful servant with the skills of praying the correct way.
Ok. This is just for now. I may have more to come!
Take care!

2007-11-22T15:29:00.000+08:00

hello people.i haven been blogging.

but today, i am going to share with you funny pictures i saw at engrish.com.

real funny.

you would really want to be catious about dropping down.
i am sorry to argue with you sir, but how can i buy a used tissue?!
so, do i go in or not?
you sure you want to go in to this shop? you might get beaten up by the 'hitman'.

this place sucks. lets go somewhere else.

hey. dont abuse the plastic bags. wait. how do you do that?!

try getting a bucket of water.

aim well guys.

yeah! beware of safety. lets be dangerous!

2007-11-13T01:37:00.000+08:00

unfairness in the world is so real. have you gone through one?

yesterday's class, my lecturer told me how unfair the world can be.
If you go for an interview, you would want to go and dress nicely so that you can present yourself well. If it is mostly americans, then you would want to dress more american-ish. If it is more english, then you would want to dress more english like. you wouldn't want to dress to formal becoz it would probably shows that you are proud. and at the same time, you wouldn't want to dress so humbly that it would downgrade your status.

well... today i experienced a glipse of unfairness. The one who told me about unfairness, is the one who showed me unfairness. And that is my lecturer.

My team did a project. When we got back our reply forms, we are so happy that we got an A. How great that is. An A! But we couldn't read her feedbacks. So, after class we went to ask her. Guess what, after she read, she hold both my other two team-mates hands and ask them wether they put in a lot of effort. I was like... what am i? Am i invicible?
Then she carry on, congratulating them and tell them they should continue in marketing and stuff like that. My bro and i was like... us?
YEAH!!! I know! we got an A! SO WHAT?! where's my glory?
don't sound as if i didn't do my work. don't sound as if i never put in my effort. I DID!!!
What am i? Some weirdos who got recruited to a team and just be there to drink tea and let the others do the job?

To this lecturer, i am really happy to have you as my marketing lecturer. Really happy. You have a great personality. You are a very interesting person. And i really like that about you. However, this was the fall of it. The dissapointment of everything. I hope not to hear sorries and apologies, but i want you to know, I DID MY WORK!!! MY BROTHER DID HIS WORK!!! THILINA DID HIS WORK TOO!!! We all did our work. And i really hope that the glory can be equally given to everyone.

Maybe, this is another testing from the Lord. To tell me that the world is so unfair. Yes LC, you've got what you want. You've taught the most ultimate lesson ever. UNFAIRNESS.

2007-10-20T21:08:00.000+08:00

hello... its been i think... erm... 2 months since i blog. haha.
what happen to me the last 2 months...i had one month of holiday from september. and i start school on october 1st.
In september, i went to China, Macau, and Hong Kong for about a wk.
My plane stopped at Macau and then straight go to Guangzhou. Then stay there for a while and go to Hong Kong. And back to Macau on the last day. But before the day end, we went back to guangzhou to buy stuff. Haha. Anyway, I will update this next time bah...
Well... today, I got a present from a very good friend in church. Its for my birthday. Really rather advance birthday present.
She got me chocolates.
I think i was rather selfish not to share, but i really dun want to share with anyone else. Haha.
I ate it all at one go.
I really like it coz the chocoates were rather bitter. Its bitter-sweet. Then i was reminded of something call friendship.
Friendship can sometimes be bitter; sometimes sweet. Well, i hope the aftertaste is all it is.
LaiYing, I want to tell you how much i want to thank the Lord that He had set you aside for me to be friends.
I really appreciate our friendship. And as long as we are together with the Lord, our friendship will be everlasting. Even till the end time of the earth. Our friendship will still continue in heaven, last forever and ever. Praise the LORD!!!
Yesterday, my family and I went to Malaysia to watch a midnight movie. Haha. Why neh? so many ask.... cheap lorh, what else. Haha. We watched Resident Evil. Rather nice. But got shocked not at the really shocking parts. But because of the extra loud surrounding sound in the theatre. Louder than Singapore's. Trust me.... My brother say i kicked his chair when i got shocked. wahahahahaha.....
I shall wait for the 22nd....
Come What May!!!

"Blessed be the LORD;
Because He has heard the voice of my supplications!
The LORD is my strength and my shield;
My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;
Therefore my heart greatly rejoices,
And with my song I will praise Him."
Psalm 28:6-7

2007-09-05T03:16:00.000+08:00

its been slightly more than one week of Si Qiu's death.
definitely we miss his presence in the church. however, we are proud that he has finished what he has to be done on earth.

"I have fought the good fight.
I have finished the race.
I have kept the faith."
2 Timothy 4:7

When i read this passage again, i felt that this is a great challenge to me. To fight well in the battle of sin, to finish my race in life, and finally to keep my faith. To do so many things, and to do well is always a challenge to anyone, but especially to me. I have to admit i am lazy.

So what?

DON'T BE LAZY!!!

what can i do then? oh well... cultivate myself not to be so lazy, pushing myself in the race.

That was one thought. Another thought, is that i remember of Si Qiu. Like i always say, when God take him home, he has finished his race, fought the good fight, and definitely kept his faith.

Sigh... I wonder in the end, what will become of me. There's this song, I think all dead people like to sing to us... LOL.

FIND US FAITHFUL

We're pilgrims of the journey of the narrow road,
And those who've gone before us line the way.
Cheering on the faithful, encouraging the weary,
Their lives a stirring testament to God's sustaining grace.

Surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses,
Let us run the race not only for the prize,
But as those who've gone before us, let us leave to those behind us
The heritage of faithfulness passed on through godly lives.

Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful,
May the fire of our devotion light their way.
May the footprints that we leave
Lead them to believe,
And their lives we live inspire them to obey.
Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful.

After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone,
And our children sift through all we've left behind,
May the clues that they discover and the mem'ries they uncover
Become the light that leads them to the road we each must find.

Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful,
May the fire of our devotion light their way,
May the footprints that we leave
Lead them to believe,
And the lives we live inspire them to obey.
Oh, may all who come behind us find us faithful.

(P.S. When it says "After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone" It actually means, when we die. Then the children, the next generation, would be impacted of things in our lives, testament for God. Then with all the different memories and clues, it is our hope that it would lead them to God in the rightful way.)

2007-08-29T01:43:00.000+08:00

O rejoice in the LORD
He make no mistake
He knoweth the end of each path that I take
For when I am tried and purified
I shall come forth as gold

I was doing my exam paper today and I remember these words that were sang at the vigil.
The vigil service had over 800 people. The most I had ever seen. It shows how well respected he is.
Pastor said these words, ' A man can live 3 times as much as Si Qiu did, but not gain as much respect than he had.'
And i cried. These words were carved in my heart. The song was repeating over and over again.
I started crying in the middle of the exams.

I remembered that morning, I felt weird as it was raining. As though things were going too smooth and something would happen, like that day my grandma pass away.
We were celebrating our 34th anniversary, and the occassion was so happy.
Then, the news was told to us. I was shocked and not believing that Si Qiu has passed away.
The next 5 minutes was no reaction. Then, unknowingly, my tears just flowed at the lost of a friend.
Thoughts came into my mind where God has a plan for everything. And this became a wake up call for everything in life.
A bad note to start the 35th year. But a good lesson to learn.
It may be a bad loss, but Si Qiu's purpose of living has been finished. So he has gone home to be with the Lord.

The song below gives me a lot of encouragement. But now I sing it, I would remember Si Qiu.
May this song comforts all hearts, and to Uncle, Auntie and Si Yu, God has a plan for all of us. Si Qiu has finished his race. He fight the good fight, and had won the prize. Now, he is up there, watching us, continue running in our race of life. He is a good runner, a good fighter. To friends of Si Qiu, you may be comrades in the army, or a family in church, or a brother or sister in Christ, always remember that Si Qiu has touched your heart. Change for the better. Have him as an example. And though it may be sad, always remember what good thing has Si Qiu left for you. No matter is his lessons in camps, or his smiles, every single thing, remember it.

This song is for everyone who is in need.

O Rejoice In The Lord

God never moves without purpose or plan
When trying His servant and moulding a man
Give thanks to the Lord though your testings seem long
In darkness He giveth a song

O rejoice in the Lord
He makes no mistake
He knoweth the end of each path that I take
For when I am tried and purified
I shall come forth as gold

I could not see through the shadows ahead
So I looked at the cross of my Saviour instead
I bowed to the will of the Master that day
Then peace came and tears fled away

O rejoice in the Lord
He makes no mistake
He knoweth the end of each path that I take
For when I am tried and purified
I shall come forth as gold

Now I can see testing comes from above
God strengthens His children and purges in love
My Father knows best and I trust in His care
Through purging more fruit I will bear

O rejoice in the Lord
He makes no mistake
He knoweth the end of each path that I take
For when I am tried and purified
I shall come forth as gold

"according to my earnest expectation and hope that in nothing i shall be ashamed, but with all boldness, as always, so now also Chris will be magnified in my body, wether by life or by death. For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain." Phil 1:20 - 21

In memory of Captain Ho Si Qiu, a faithful servant of God, and a brother in Christ.

2007-08-26T13:54:00.000+08:00

What a great lesson, LORD, to magnify Your name even in difficult times.
You have brought home Si Qiu, and at the same time, made us all learn to love you, to treasure people, and to even magnify Your name in these circumstances.

I don't want to shed a tear of grieve. Not to Si Qiu, that he has gone. But to Si Qiu, that i am joyful that you are with the LORD.

Be joyful, my friends and family of Si Qiu. Because the LORD has brought Si Qiu to his care and protection, and that he will never ever anymore suffer in the evil grasp of the world.

One lesson i have learned from you, Si Qiu, is to smile. Smile widely, and having the joy and happiness in God. I want too, to smile widely, and spread it across to everyone around me. And you, have affected me too.

Si Qiu, see you in heaven one day. And then, we shall worship the LORD together as friends and family again.

In rememberance of my dear friend, Ho Si Qiu. 26 August 2007, Sunday.

2007-06-26T03:17:00.000+08:00

aha!!! this is such a long time since i blog.
it's my last week of holiday.
i pass my exams. rather happy.
coz i totally didn't know how to do my exam papers. they say there was much moderation done.
sigh~~~ it feels like i have been cheated because i know that is not really my results...
what a failure.

oh~ and junior camp was fun.
but it was also tiring. coz we had lotsa cleaning to do on my first day.
starting from 7 everyday, its been like nonstop work, nonstop cleaning.
but i did have some naps in between. totally no energy to carry on when i don't have the sleep.
but though, GOD also gave me lots of strength to face everyday.... with a smile.

after junior camp, which is now, i am helping my parents in their business.
my uncle is not free though... he went to reservist. which is good news. he needs the exercise.
he is getting fatter and more.... temperate.
well... without him there, and us helping, the place seems more peaceful. and also make me less busy.
because he is kinda irritating though~~~
but... actually i am more busy than yesterday. and plus.... i get more bruises.
i am rather clumsy. i got cuts and bruise... in total, 7.
and imagine.... i have 5 more days to continue...
i would get 35 more cuts and bruises....
and in total, 42!!!
ouch!!! my body!!!

but helping my mother is rather a good experience.
i get to learn many types of thing.
and i told my mum, 'teach me all your stuff, how you differentiate the durians, how you choose them, how you see them. then next time i will stand infront and sell. then you would have time to eat dinner.'
but i kinda think that i wouldn't want to take over the business.
my parents kinda wish there would be someone to take over the business, but actually in fact, they also know that none of us want to. and they want us to choose our path.
they are rather open too.
but thinking of so many things.... i kinda waiver.

well.... i have some more years to think.
long time to think.
maybe after i study my diploma, i decided to continue my studies and work somewhere else.
afterall, i wish to work overseas, and also want to become a big shot when i am older.... like being a CEO of some large company.
probably microsoft... lol.

oh~ and i also realise, i prefer to eat XO durians than Butter durians.
XO durians have a stronger smell than Butter. It is much more bitter than Butter. It is super soft. It is white flesh. It is so bitter that it kinda have some XO taste as well.
Butter durians have a range of very wet (means soft) and rather dry (means lotsa fibre). it is not as bitter as XO. It is not as soft as XO. XO durians are... when you take, you have to be super becareful because it will kinda slip of your fingers if you never take carefully. and that your fingers will sink into the flesh and eventually find yourself touching the seed. Butter durians are more firm than XO. the skin of the Butter is hmm~~~ good!!
But i prefer XO because the eating method is very much different. It's kinda like.... eating the dragon beard sweet. its like melt-in-your-mouth type. But i don't want to offer XO durians for those who doesn't like bitter and soft durians. I would recommend Butter durians instead. :)

oh well... just to tell ya... i am eating durians now. hehe.

2007-05-26T23:06:00.000+08:00

hello!!!

i went swimming with yun today. at 12 nn!!! we swam for abt 2 hrs la....

and in the end, i got sunburn!

such a loser!

my parents came back from kunming one the 19th... and off they go to guangzhou on the 22nd....

what a trip...

they are enjoying their 'pre-retirement' life.. lol

anyway.... i went macs.....
and i got this shrek hairband...

i think its rather cool. coz i am named shrek in camp... haha

show u the pic....

...nice rite?

2007-05-16T21:50:00.000+08:00

oh man.... lousy week. haha
not really to the extend.
i just had a 39.3 degrees fever that now have a phlegm problem.
and then i had rushed my group work with so many irresponsible people.
and my parents dump me to honeymoon in china, in a beautiful place, shangri-la.

sigh!!! so fast my sem is going to end. rather happy with it!
hehe. but it marks with the initial 'EXAMS' and my reply:KILLER

oh well.... i miss dad n mum... wonder how they r now.

2007-05-05T01:51:00.000+08:00

man... i am turning panda.
my project mates are not doin their work!
make me and my bro till now not slpin yet!
and its due tmr
and we have to wake up early tmr to hand up!
what the hell.....

2007-05-01T22:45:00.000+08:00

hello.... its MAYDAY! i hope that is no air crash. haha. i went study with chester today. a bit tired. so many things to do but did nothing much. haha.compared to his, mine is puny. he did math. but a lot of careless mistakes. so i kinda help him.

i think i should post some photos from lao da's birthday, 17 April 2007. Gosh! he's 29 n still way lonely! lol. wonder is he... ahem! should not say further. the internet has no walls. haha.

me and lao da.... nice picture. i like. :)

the kcp... jojo is not a kcp.

the whites...

vs the blacks. SO WHERE AM I???

jojo... got forced to drink because he lose in the game.

the food we eat.... the more civilised ones. the uncivilised ones are unbearable.

the ladies.... on the train.

lao da holding his birthday box. nice eh? u would be shock at what we give him. :)

not suppose to show u... hehe. but i think its interesting. its one of his birthday gift.

and a group photo to end it all...

and nite nite everyone :)

2007-04-23T20:04:00.000+08:00

hello... its been so long since i update my blog.
there's so many stuff going on these few weeks.
i have a lot of deadlines to rush. all my deadlines are packed like mad.
so many things all revolving around me.
some are bad, some are good.
some are friendship problems, some are....
sigh.......

in my msn i wrote 'i am sorry, i love you.'
everyone have the same perceptions. haha. its the korean show la.
but there's something in it.... just dun care la!

anyway, i have been really down because of so many things.
i have been already giving you all clues after clues, yet u all know nothing.
and yet you all have been hurting me again and again.
and i have tried to ignore, yet things are still getting to me,
like adding on layers of books on my shoulders for me to carry.
how can i afford to let you all know the thruth that really hurts you all?
you all are my precious.
there are so many times where i want to tell all of you. but why must you all reject me?
why must you all push me to the corner of the wall?
why must you all put me in darkness, yet being seen but is just something insignificant.
pricks. painful. why me?

2007-04-09T23:51:00.000+08:00

oh man... i am feeling so lousy now. i am sick.
down with flu.
thanks God, that eventhough i had sore throat last week, during the easter week, my voice isn affected. so i can sing. and then so immediately la. on this fateful day after all the crucial singing, i am sick. haha.
oh well... God, You rockz! lol.

this easter week was good for me. its also the first week of school.
on thursday its the maundy thursday service. then friday is concert. and saturday is concert as well. then sunday is easter lunch. a whole trail of 'work'. haha.
its really fun, practising and singing together, worshipping the LORD. i feel like we are in heaven and singing and worshipping the LORD.

last monday, which is the start of my sch, my sister flew to perth. to pack her stuff and go for camp. she's gonna come back on my bro's birthday, 13 april. haha. cool siah! come back on time.

school is quite fun actually. i like the lecturers, for both english and MPO. not MATH!!! terrible. the lecturer is more boring than mrs tay. haha.
even i am tired, i will not sleep at MPO and english. but math, almost!

oh, and last night, my parents flew to perth. to join my sister in the camp. and then they going for 10 days. they say they gonna die there la. and i agree. the last time i went for 10 days too, i also almost hang up already. haha.

and i really need to rest now. have sch tmr. and besides, my nose is so red after all the sneezing and rubbing, i need a rest too. irritating nose. when i was having my afternoon nap, my nose start to on the tap. idoit.

alrightie. nite nite

2007-03-29T05:10:00.000+08:00

i have like so much time now so i keep posting.
i would be busy from now on.

tommorow i have orientation, then np camp.
then on saturday i will have choir and rehearsal.
sunday, rehearsal again.
and then next week start school.
sigh.... things are getting more and more buzzy here.

2007-03-26T02:38:00.000+08:00

more and more practices for easter concert is coming up.
oh well, its good because then i would be more and more familiarised with all the actions and my parts.
i hope to bring my friends, but they would be busy and they will also decline my offer.

with more practices coming up, i have to forsake so many other things.
i am still thinking wether i want to go to np camp.
i tell myself, i have nothing to do with np anymore. so might as well dun go. but then yun wants me to accompany her, so i say ok lorh.
oh well, this would be the first and the last time i would come back as an ex-nco for the camp. and after all these, i would not want to do anything with np anymore other than memories.

alright. i will start let go of everything and pick up more of other things.
lets get it right. everything is bad things and also of the things i dun want to let go. and to pick up new things is to walk in the spirit in christ. so must learn la.
so muz jia you lorh!

jia you!

2007-03-24T01:21:00.000+08:00

have anyone written your own fairy tale, with you, yourself as the main character?

fairy tales
they are myths and give one a sense of happiness in reading, hence, its call fairy tales.
it's because these stories would never happen hence, people write them.

fairy tales like cinderella, snow white, and 3 little pigs, gives a happy ending. which fairy tales gives a sad ending.

shows nowadays are like another version of the fairy tale. even to the bad side of it, it gives a sense of happiness, it just wether you choose to look the brighter side. in times of hardship, fairy tales are the best to be written down because it gives a relief and hope to them.

do you believe in this world there is a happy ever after?
you ask me, i would say yes.
in this world, things will vanish one day.
dust to dust, ashes to ashes.
our souls will then either go to heaven or hell, happiness or suffer.
but my believe in the happy ever after is not earthly, but heavenly.
when i die, that is the happy ever after.

my fairy tale story is then...
what is yours?

2007-03-22T23:38:00.000+08:00

you are my joy and my pain;
my rest and noise;
my love and my hate.

you made me happy to high skies,
yet you drop me to lower grounds.
you made promises with joy,
yet break them with a smile.

you dissapoint me.
you leave me.
my tears uncontrollably fall with sadness.

you break it.
you slain it.
my heart hurts with streaks of pain.

why this so?

2007-03-18T22:51:00.000+08:00

i see him....
its such a long time i see him.
it seems that i had so many things to say to him, but no.

i thought i could see him, talk to him.
no.

i thought that they would be so happy to hear my call.
but no.

life is so experiential.

tears of sadness, tears of joy
crying, laughter
all come round.
but why do humans have to go through all these?
why do we have to go through all these times?

God gave us the chance to live as humans who have feelings.
but also gave us to satan, to test us, and then to let our faith to be genuine and precious as gold. so that one day we would walk on the streets of gold, live in that big mansion, with no day and night, with that joyous praise and worship everyday, everytime. all these trying times are the testings.

2007-02-27T17:00:00.000+08:00

Meaning For Singing Easter

hello....
i have been indulging on this question, 'Whats my meaning of singing easter this year?'
i had a talk with some of the ''older'' people who is gonna sing for easter. they taught me a lot through their lives and leading as an example.
then i remember about the point that pastor taught during conference 2006. is that if u have no meaning in singing these songs, it means nothing, and the song is nothing.

then i remember that there was once the youth choir was singing 'Lord, I Lift Your Name On High'. the youth choir was singing with the music. and suddenly something went wrong with the player, but the choir sang as though the music didn stop. and they kept on singing. then they realised that the music stop. and they also stop. haha.
and its because they were so in into the sing, so in into their meaning of singing the song.
so whats our reason for singing then?
for me, i want to sing because i want to share God's love to the people who attend the concert. and to also be a testament to others. :)

so... singers, what's your meaning of singing this easter?

2007-02-17T00:24:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 10 (LAST DAY!!! HSH)

Its that last day. Yeah!!! I am back home now, if not how can i post rite?

What happens today is a wreck of the trip that makes the whole 10 days into a shit!

In the morning, both my dad and i were well prepared to start to move out of the hotel, and then eat breakfast with uncle terrence and then go to church le.
But then, something happen.
My dad went to the car to put the luggages in the car. He opened the door and put some small stuff at the front seat. He left the key at the keyhole. Then he slammed the door. Rather, in nice terms, he closed the door. And the metal thing to off the sensor burst and lost. And that makes it that we cannot drive the car to church, cannot take our stuff to church, cannot put the car in church. Which is a big matter!

So my dad called uncle andru, and uncle andru gave us this shun and started complaining why give him this kind of things to do. Killer because of his mouth. But that doesn matter. He is a nice guy though, coz he gave birth to nice kids.

Then we took a cab with uncle terrence. The travelling fee from Ambassador to churh is 15 bucks AUSSIE!!! Which is like less that a 10 mins drive la!!!

Then we got church, we settled down. Then just nice, auntie chris and uncle andru came. So my dad went to talk to uncle andru about this thing. Then he say he not free to do these. So we say ok lorh, we ask others to do. Then we find uncle gerarld to help us do lorh. And then uncle henry chip in also. Because he know a mechanic who can do that. Then uncle gerarld can drive off the car back to his place and put there. So we ok ok lorh. We anything anyway.

So, after the service, they had a fellowship lunch. Which is kinda more of a weird thing from what we do in Bethany. Everytime, in Bethany, the cooks will cook, unless its some super small thing than the commitee would buy food or prepare easy stuff. But this fellowship lunch is everyone chip in to bring food to share food and eat them together. Cool eh?

So we hurry need to rush back to the hotel to get our luggage, because somebody gonna fetch us. We had uncle wong to fetch us back. Nice car he have. On the way back, my dad forgot about the key, car key. He gave it to uncle henry! So how are we gonna take our stuff?!
Then we have to u-turn back. late le lorh.
So we get the key and then we hurry rush to get the luggage. Sickening driver. Rush rush rush. make my shirt spoil le.

That was the second thing that made the trip wrecked.
Then like that check-in le. And flew off after meeting the others. Pastor and auntie sally fly tmr.

Alrightie. Sleep sleep. tonight very stressful at the plane. CANNOT SLEEP AGAIN! ->bright sun.

2007-02-07T01:09:00.001+08:00

PERTH DAY 9

Its Saturday, so fast!!! TOMMOROW GOING HOME!!!
SOOOOOOoooOOOOOOooooooo EARLY!

Didn't do much today actually. I spent some time do some packing so today would be lighter for me la.
Uncle Gerard and Camy came to find us arh.... We went for dim sum... NO GOOD DIM SUM! But i still ate la. My dad took the reciept and pay before they could react. LOL!!!
Then we went to Camy's working place, at the jetty there, near the bell tower. Beautiful skies!
After that, we went around lorh... nothing to do. Went to Aunty Chris place to pack my sister's things and get back the computer. And then went to Aunty SeeToh's place, who is Uncle Gerard's sister i think.....
Then we hurry rush back to the city, the this place call the Old Swan Bewery. There are 3 restaurants there. We ate the Western one. GOODIE!!! Very good food. We ate from 5 to 9!!! SIAOZ! And we took a group photo. There was a total of 13 Singaporeans there. Its a very romantic and beautiful place la.

Aiya.... now i packing la.... Tmr leave after church. Flight at 4 plus singapore time... abt 5...

2007-02-03T02:11:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 8

Its the big day today! Friday, 26 January '07.
The big day that Chris is gonna be installed.
And it's Australian Day.

Eventhough i slept kinda late, but i made the effort to actually wake up early to go to auntie mary's place for breakfast with the other Bethany team who came. Not all i mean.... We had a lot of joke during the breakfast. Auntie Sally was mean for once, to her own good friend. Or maybe she was always mean towards her own good friend, because they know her well enough. Like they were saying that Uncle Winston is an ancient pharasee, yet live in a mordern world. And he doesn't know how to operate the water heater to dispose the water, and yet he say that the water have to be cleared if not algaes will grow in there. Haha...
Then, off we went to church, help out to prepare food and place for the installation. Chris was so happy, the Singapore team so supports him, I went to peel prawns. Ewww... blood all over my fingers... not the shells, but the head. Then after peeling, we had lunch. Lebanese food. Its Australian day, and Perth is the only mad city that doesn't open their shops during holidays, just to celebrate. So we had trouble looking for food lorh. So, they went somewhere, anything that is open, to buy food. And brought back tons of food to eat, Lebanese food.
After lunch, of course help to clean lah.... how to be so evil to let the aunties clean leh?
So clean le, the aunties went back to hotel to bathe, rest and come back to church at 5. When i want to look for my dad, he went missing!!! Aiyo!
Then i remember, he went back to the city, to get cleaned, and then go with Uncle Daniel to go to the airport to fetch tr. Peng hui and Uncle Terrence.
So i was tired, and i went into the playroom, to find Uncle George and Uncle Victor there worh.... No matter how weird it is to share a room with two old grown man, i still need the aircon and rest. They were reading. So i sat at one end of the couch and fall asleep. Uncle George say that, come and sleep can, but expect some symphony going on later. LOL!!! Anyway, it was 41 degrees outside. KILLER!!!
Soon after, i told Uncle George i want to lie down. Being a man, he gave me the whole couch to lie on. So man right?! Then i lied down, wanting to go back to sleep. Then i realize, Uncle George sat on the matteress, put down his book after a minute or so, then he lied down too. Then i close my eyes. Next minute i heared, is his symphony!!! Wahahahahaha!!! Goodness! I tried to sleep again. But it took me about 5 minutes to get back to sleep.
Someone then came and off the aircon!!! Must be Uncle Victor, coz i think i took his blanket, so it was cold for him. Then i felt it was hot. Until bua-ta-han le, i woke up and went to clean myself up and prepare for the night's programme.
Chris was all well prepared, all-ready. Smiling at me, saying hi. I was happy for him, for the church, for the people.
Then the church start to be filled. Slowly, the Singaporean team strolls in into the church, all prepared for the service. So is tr. Peng Hui and also Uncle Terence. They finally caught onto the plane. All together, 22 people from the Bethany team has come together! All behind Chris for him!
During the service, Chris cried, tears of joy. Well, we somehow cried too, happy for him mah!
The Singapore side, Bethany in Singapore, watched over the webcam. It wasn't very steady la. So it was quite bad. But i know that Chris still appreciate it one in another way.
Well, all things come to an end. The sevice ended. Some are leaving, to go back to Singapore. Pastor Mitch, Mark, Uncle Jacob, Uncle George and many many more.
There was a barrier at the City, so we couldn leave. It was Australian Day mah! Then we stay in church lorh. Then i was standing with some Uncle and Aunties, together with baby Lauren, Nick, and Sook Yee. Then we asked Nick for coke. I was dying to have one. The bottle of coke is smaller than ours, and also expensive. Its 2 bucks arh! But Nick works in coca-cola. So all the F&N drinks he could take for free. So he gave us the Coke Zero. Ok la. Not as bad as the low sugar one. Well, we dared him to give it to Pastor, see if Pastor drinks it.
He really give worh! So is Auntie Sally! And Pastor drank coke!!! Aiyo! Everyone was taking pictures of him drinking. haha!!! But its kinda weird. Its not really the Singapore people are taking. But the Aussies are! Coz, its like we always see pastor, we know what he likes and dun likes, and he dun drink coke de mah. But the Aussies dun really see him as often de la. But they seem more excited than we are worh. haha!!!
After everything arh, still can go where la.... Of coz come back to hotel la, together with Uncle Terrence, and tr.Peng Hui.
Weird leh... where's my dad. He actually dumped me and went for supper with Uncle Gerard and Camy worh! Me leh? Not the eating part la... But i want to talk to Camy la......
Such an irritating father....

Oh well, sleep le lah. Dun wait for him le! So long still haven't come back.
....arh! There is the knock.....

2007-01-25T22:01:00.000+08:00

Perth Day 7

Today, i woke up for lunch. Haha. Just nice. :)

Today we had lunch on the sea. It's an italian restaurant, Jojo. Its superb.
We had appitizers, then the main course.
I ordered chicken. Good. But it was breastmeat. Quite tough. But it was the sauce and the veges that made the dish taste good. I tried some of beef and salmon and also liguine. BRAVA!!! SUPERB!!! really good you know?! Adding along is the sight infront of me, the sea. Beautiful. Had a super full super good lunch.
Then we came back to the hotel. And we sleep again!!! Pig!!! But it was not really a good sleep. It was around 36 degrees outside and then we didn't on the aircom. Until we felt that we were in a sauna, then we realize that the aircon wasn't on. And i went to on the coldest. Super hot. Really very summer type.
Then we went to this chinese seafood restaurant. We had 2 differnt types of scallops on the shell!!! And then we had snow crab fried with salted egg. And then we had Lobster noodles... hmm~~~ yumm yummmmmm... Then we had 2 veges, one is winter melon, another is the spinach fried with 3 different types of egg. The normal one, salted egg, and century egg.
Its really good.

So now, i am back in the room and let me tell u, i am going to sleep again!!! Hello!!! I am going to turn like joanne la! PIG EH!!!
But now, is go bathe first. I will have lots of things to do tommorow. Because of the installation. Right~~~ Got to go now. See ya :)

2007-01-25T21:29:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 6

Today, it was a piggy day! GOODNESS!!!

Whole day i was sleeping. Then i struggled myself up to go to Uncle Henry's place to look at the place that i may probably stay if i study here.
Well, i got lovely food from Aunty June. A very nice lady, wife of Uncle Henry, and mother of two sons, Enoch and Elijah. Elijah's a very nice and open kid. I like him!!! He's so cute! ><
Then we went to churh for the welcoming bbq from the ypg and yag group.
We reached there quite early. I walked around, talk with some of the teens, and some that i had met long ago, like for example, ken, Aunty Chris' son. He is more open now, talk to me, joke with me. And he looks nicer now! I dare say that. He looks so much sexier than the last time i met him.... i think it was last yr. But my opinion of him had changed so much from the first time i met him last sunday.
Oh well, I had a full dinner. Then i walked to the steps at the basketball court, sat at the top and looked out. Beautiful. The sky that Singapore will never have and never will have. Staying here would bring good and bad points. The beautiful nature here is way more of a winner to Singapore, and i think to any other country as well. Whereas, things here, and life back in Singapore is no way that we should compare because Singapore is smaller but yet, its so noisy, more city life everywhere. Whereas, in Perth, its so much quieter here, more like a relaxed life here. I kinda love it, for a change.
Sitting on that steps had brought me to look more and see more of life. It came to me that time had ticked so fast. 3 years. 3 years that brought chris back to Perth to carry on his ministry. What have i done the last 3 years? Other than study, and NPCC, i kinda remember that there is only rubbish. No life that is fruitful. Time i wasted will not be bcak. But, i can turn the time in future to be fruitful and more meaningful.
I know a friend while i was stiiting there. I dun really know how to spell her name. But she ask me to call her Kat. I talked to her about many things relating to church, the difference between Bethel and Bethany. I think she had learned a lot from the talk. So do i, to open myself so people would open to me.

Oh well, I am going to sleep now.

Goodnight :)

2007-01-24T21:23:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 5

Its so fast, day 5 now.

I was sleeping till 12 nn. And then we had lunch at 3. Then i received a call from the team from Bethany. Finally!!! Aiya! Then they say we have a dinner at 6! Aiyo!!! 6 eh! Goodness!
Then we went for dinner at 6. But we first meet the team from Bethany at Seasons of Perth. Then we walked together to the place where we gonna eat, which is Grand Palace Restaurant, at Esplanade, near the swan river. Cool!!! I took a lot of photos...
I try not to eat so much. Anyway, the food is soooooo good, that makes me wants to eat it. Its a high class restaurant, which originally is from The Esplanade Hotel. But i think this is the branch, if not, its a moved out.
We split into 2, the ladies, and the men. And we had a girls' talk. And the guys had a men's talk. Cool eh? Kinda weird to think that the guys, mostly made of pastors, are having a men's talk. Goodness!!! So alamak. Haha.
Then we came back and say nite nite.

So now, i am getting ready to sleep. Trust me, I am dead tired because from all the talk. Because i wasn't the one talking. The youngest of both tables dun talk. Like the guy's side they have Joel. And the ladies side they have me. I cannot catch up to them... LOL

2007-01-23T00:39:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 4

today was a whole slacking time. most of my time was spent either on the lappy or my bed. I kinda didn't go out today. Haha. I found out that there is DST in Perth, and its for trial. DST=Daylight Saving Time. It makes it adds on the normal GMT time an hr. That means, that the time difference now between Singapore and Perth is an hr, where Perth is one hr before of Singapore.

oh well, we skipped breakfast today because i was a pig... keep sleeping. Well, then i woke up for lunch. We drove to chinatown and had dine in at this vietnam and asian cusine. The name of the restaurant is Saigon. Well, it was kinda worth the money. Really really huge bowl. Double the portion, double the price. Haha.
Then all the time we have been in the hotel slacking. Because pastor didn't come to find us, and we were afraid that pastor would come and find us.
Haha... I think today's post is the shortest of all.

I spent all day watching downloaded DN Angel. Bored to death. But lucky, haven't die.
Hope that tommorow would be a better day then. :)

2007-01-21T21:12:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 3

Day 3 in Perth now. Things had been going through kinda smoothly.

This morning, as usual, breakfast first. Then we went to church. If we were not to be lost, we will be there right on time. But then, we went without our map. And hence, we were there late. Very late... When we reached church, they had just finished. Haha.We stayed over for lunch and kinda had a fellowship with them. I say kinda because other than Pheebs and some older folks, none has talk to me! And i think its quite right that what Auntie Peggy says. I shall not elaborate.
After that, we went back to the hotel here, and i slept. Haha.
Then there was a call from Uncle William. We met him at Fremantle and then we had a catch. Wohoo!!! Fishing!!! i caught 4 fishes. 2 puffer fish, and 2 Yellow Tail. So sad... Its 2 puffer fish. Cannot eat de!!! Poisonous.
After the catching, we went to eat fish and chips!!! YEAH!!! Its just next to the place. So its very convinient. Its rated the best fish and chips in WA. It cost A$10.50. Its very big packet with no sauces. The sauces, one small pack cost A$0.30. Which is...S$0.36. And if u know me well, i like lots of sauces on my plate, so it would cost a bomb!!! Haha. But i didn get any sauces. I took flavourings. There is a station where the salt, pepper, and vinegar are. The people take so much as though they dun cost a cent. And maybe they dun cost a cent! I also took, since i need taste and the salt and pepper are there and its FOC. Haha. Its such a big packet, that even if i share with my dad, we couldn't finish! My advice to you, is that if you want to eat fish and chips, try to order 2 packet for 3 person. Even i am such a big eater, i still cannot finish.
In the end, i brought back the fish and chips to the hotel and i try to eat whatever i can... aiya, dun waste mah. The fries are like as though they dun cost a thing. That's what makes it such a big packet. In the end, i only finish the fish and didn't eat the fries. Haha.

Alrighty... That's all for it for now. Pastor is coming tommorow. It would be such an experience to travel with him...brrr... kinda scary too. LOL!!!

2007-01-21T00:43:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 2

hello... its the second day in perth.
so fast le worh...

Today, after breakfast, we drove up to the market place at canningvale. My dad cheated me. Say there will be alot of bargains and u see people start snatching bargained food like meat, veges, and fruits. All these daily necessities here are very expensive. Over these years, the prices had gone up because of the inflation. In the end, when we reach there, no people, no bargains, no snatching. How dissapointing.
After buying some sweets from the marketplace, we drove to Fremantle, another town in WA. It is beautiful. But i forgot to bring camera, so i didn take a picture of the sight when we drove up the hill and saw the blue sea that blends into the blue sky. Very VERY beautiful. We drove around and got lost half the time. Haha. And we drove to the prison. I felt very ironic. Such a beautiful place with an ugly feature in it. The prison is open to the public at some places, of course, no contact with criminals. And to get in, you have to pay a certain amt of $$$. Then we drove around and we finally reached to the Fremantle Marketplace. Waaa.... Super lotsa stuff. Quite reasonable price la. Then we bought some seadless grapes and strawberries. Then we went back. I put the fruits in the car, along with the sweets. Allow me to tell you, eventhough the weather is cool, but then the sun rays are glaring. And then i put in the car, and the strawberried start to get spoil. and the sweets are melting to the aluminium wrappers. I didn know that till i reach the hotel.
After the Fremantle trip, we went to Uncle Tony and Auntie Peggy's place. we had a talk with them over large amount of isseues. They are Jimmy's parents. Nice people. Then they brought us to the nearest supermarket. And we brought over 60 bucks of chocolate. Hey tell you, u think its alot, BUT ITS NOT!!! We buy these in offers, YET, its still expensive. But i dare say, these chocolates are best!!! Aussie chocolates are best because they make with their own grown cocoa. GOOD!!! BAGUS!!! They wanted to leave us for dinner, but then we are meeting another person for dinner. Then we departed and come back to the hotel.
When we were back at the hotel, we got tired, and we slept. Then Uncle Gerard call and say that he just finish work and going back for a bath, and then come fetch us for dinner. So i say ok. Then i reckon, it will be around 8 la. So i slept. Then we had a miss call. Haha. It was about 7.30 then. I struggle myself up and get ready for dinner. When i reach the lobby, it was around 8. And then he came to fetch us to chinatown to eat. Finally!!! Chinatown! We eat Peking Duck (3 types). They used the duck, to put in 3 different ways. The skin was cut to eat like a popiah. Then the meat was diced and but in a raw cabbage and suppose to eat like korean bbq like that. Then what is left is the bones la. The bones, cannot do anything le mah. So they boil soup. Smart right? All together was about 50 over. And can 'da-pao' also. Becoz cannot eat finish. For a typical Aussie, its quite cheap for 4. Imagine, if there are around 6 people, it will be cheaper. Very filling. Then they ordered kangkong and also steamed fish. ARHHH.... the first meal in Perth that is so full. Then after dinner, we dun want to go back to the hotel, so we went for a drink. Hey, i am underage. Dun think otherwise. We went for a coffee. I had juice, because, if u rmb, i cannot drink coffee. I had a great chat with Uncle Gerard's wife. She's a HK. Then we were speaking a lot about travel. She's a very good and sharp person. But i think mummy more sharp. Wahahahahahaha.
Then after talking, they drove us back to the hotel, around 12mn. Then came back to type this and now getting ready to sleep.

Tmr have to wake up early lorh.... its church day!!! WOHOO!!!

2007-01-19T23:41:00.000+08:00

PERTH DAY 1

hey people!!!
i now at perth. hehe....
its my 2nd time coming here after 2 yrs. quite many things has changed.
its the first time out of so many trips i had, that i dun feel excited until the last minute. lol.
i came for church missions with my dad. for chris installation.
i think he must have very mix feelings. very sad to leave singapore, but then very happy that he is coming back.

i reached here at 6 plus.... the sun has already rise..... around 4 plus the sun had risen.
then when i touch down, we went into the hotel, goodness!!!!
1) far from the heart of the city, where chinatown is, where we can get reasonable food because we are chinese and my dad has no teeth!
2) far from chinatown nvm worh.... far from the train station worh!!! we wanted to go to aunty chris' place to get my sister car... but then leh? so far worh!!!
3) far nvm..... we took a shuttle bus to the train station... then on the way we saw chris' parents. and they bring us to eat. we ate vietnam food. we want some changes to it, then the person so stubborn... no! nO! NO!
4) no nvm leh... the food alot of ajinomoto!!! wahhhhhhh!!!! killer! make me drink so much water, like as if i need a lot of replenishing, because its very dry here.
5) a lot of ajinomoto nvm worh.... after we eat, we go to aunty chris' hse and then take back my sister's car. take leh hor... we dunno where to go eh! the map summore 1998 de. 1998 eh!!! i scolded my dad say he needs to update. haha.
6) 'no' map nvm worh, still kinda can use la... then we went to the church we have here, Bethel. nice and quite big. then i met enoch, uncle henry, uncle robin and another guy which i dunno of, because they are there to prepare for some things upcoming. then after we stay for a while, we wanted to leave le... we took a look at the map and we got directions from uncle henry le hor... we took our car, start it. the just nice all the aunties come. and ask us to stay. then we have to help them carry the veges....
7) carry veges nvm eh.... i kind of like it la... but then talk to aunty chris hor... like she gonna kill me like that. sigh.... i shall not elaborate on that.
8) then, when we come back to the hotel, i went to sleep. because i haven been sleeping since yesterday 2 p.m. over the air flight, i also nv sleep. cannot sleep. then the bed so small, like worse than a single like that worh....
9) then sleep halfway, wake up, then look at the window... wah, the sky still so bright. then look at my watch.... 7.22!!! hello.... 7.22 p.m eh! still bright like as if its 6p.m in singapore. damn bloody shock la.
10) actually, its not a problem if it is still bright... but then, usually its, early sunrise, early sunset. but then over here is early sunrise, later sunset. like the day has stretched so much more.
11) then i went to sleep again... my dad started to play my com, using the internet. and then the whole time he keep complaining that the network lao ya... i say no... is like that de. my com too much things le. here 1 gb there 1 gb, my lappy i think only can put 80 gb if not 100 gb only mah. make me cannot sleep....
12) then he woke me up again at 9. saying that we should go buy some dinner come back. ok lorh. then i woke up. at first, we thought, lets walk. so we walk. then so dangerous. the night life here is way way dangerous. the people talk so loud. and the there are women who just walk on the streets and grab any guy and ask if he wants to take her. i was like... jaw drop! so open siahz!
13) so we decided to walk back and grab our car. i kind of have this phobia. i like reading past cases of murder, and they unsually happen in the night. so the last thing i want to happen is to have any trouble at this place. i dun want to die yet worh. i still haven bring my friends to know the LORD. i still haven't baptise. i still haven't come to know a lot of church people from perth. and a lot A LOT nv do yet.
14) then we took the car and started driving to chinatown, half the time missing our way. lol.
15) when we reach there, there isn anything le, but fastfood, 24 hrs convenience store, dangerous people, and also beggars. fastfood...no! too many people queue-ing for it. so i went to the convenice store lorh, and get some instant noodles and chocolate. guess how much i got for one cup of instant noodles?! A$2.50!!! if i convert to singapore $, i can buy one proper meal eh. i bought 6 cups of instant noodles, and 3 chocolate bars. altogether inc. gst is A$20.85. MY GOODNESS!!!

thats all folks. i am dying here thinking of how to survive for the next few days before i start thinking of how to survive if i come and stay here to study. die!

2007-01-17T02:19:00.000+08:00

there are some photos i wld like to share...
look out at www.memopast.blogspot.com

2007-01-17T01:56:00.000+08:00

working was fun. with my colleagues. well, actually some of them.
all these were like adventures...
it didn get long because after that event hall, i was suppose to be assign to somewhere else. however, i didn get my call back. i can kiss goodbye to that job. its ok then.
it was good at the first week... where all the things happen, where i hope that job doesn clashes with these.
but it kinda get to me that my life, waiting, is lifeless. so i agreed with my dad to go to perth with him. haha!!!
so.... i am going on friday midnight and reach there on friday morning. :)
i can't wait to go there.... its been long. 2 years.

2007-01-07T01:57:00.000+08:00

hello... its been quite a time since i last updated.

anyway, first, let me say a very happy happy new year and a belated christmas to u.
i am really happy that its a new year.

secondly, i want to state some resoultions.
-i really hope to go overseas to study
-to get quite some good grade for O levels... hope its 15 and below la.
-to help gain silver for kcp npcc
-to go overseas again after i get my results.
-i think there are many many many more which i can't state now.

anyway, i started working lo.....
but that ex-supervisor till now also haven tell me where and when am i going to work...
sian arh....
that time i want to get off then they dun allow. i dun want to get off then they give me off.
idoit society.

today bert go for arena. i wonder how's the debate. but his speech quite good la. its kinda sensible. but then i think its missing alot of things. but 3 mins plus for his speech is ok la.

i stayed at yun's hse last night. all of a sudden my parents agree to it. so happy. because that time they dun allow.

oh... on friday they have a cca orientation in sch. it was quite good la. oh well, i hope this good thing will carry on lorh. things like gaining uopa points to gain the silver and everything. sigh... sadlife siahz.

oh well... got to go. have other things to do. bye bye... :)

2006-12-19T03:20:00.000+08:00

Day 1 (Singapore to Beijing)

oh well, the first day is just simply taking a 7 plus hrs of flight to beijing. i reached there about... 2330?! and when we loaded all the things and got to the bus and into our hotel rooms, it was 0030. oh man! thats how big beijing is!!!
i sat at the front sit of the cabin. which is super comfortable, very spacious leg room.... however, i can't play games and do much becoz of the system they had. and by the way, its my first time to support my own airline, SQ!!! it was rather pleasant to have to sit SQ.
The flying was, ichiban!!! aiyoyo!!! when i take off, i dunno i take off. when i touched down, i also dunno. it was just a jerk there and then nth else. that was how good la! SQ pilots are real good. hello?! what u expect from the all no.1 airline and airport la?! we are talking about singapore eh.
the tour guide is xiao li. anyway, its not his name. its just his surname and made easy for everyone to call him that, and more easier to remember. so if u are lost in beijing, shout xiao li, and i think at least 1 out of 10 ppl there will turn to you and ask who u are calling. lol.
when i reached the hotel, we were very very very very very ungry. guess what we did?! right!!! supper! and we walked down this super dark street together to go for a supper. we had mutton steam boat together with fried rice and also handmade noodles. it was... sedap!!! we asked for small portions becoz it was supper. and we were being cheated. when we say small, it is huge to us. and this huge means small to them. if u are thinking of finishing that plate of fried rice yourself, better think twice. becoz it is really huge. you can share with another person la. or maybe two other person too. lol.
after that, we had to go back becoz we have to wake up super duper early for a new day....
more to come! check it out soon. :)

2006-12-11T19:56:00.000+08:00

hey!!!
i going home very very very soon..... haha.... in a few hrs time!!!
wahahahahaha.....
finally!!! home sweet home!!! i miss my bed...
-_-!!!
anyway, tmr i will go to yc at church. then the real home sweet home only comes on friday afternoon. haha.
today is super tiring. sleep so little and go out so early. (just becoz they scared they no time to shop and no time to come back and pack.) and it was soooooo nice. why is it nice??? watch out for day 11 of the blog that i will put up. haha.....
i will type some stuff during yc and update after yc for u people to see. :)
riggghhhtt... cut the crap now.
anyway, the next time i come to china.... NO SHANGHAI!!! aiyo... tiring, busy, and eww.... i will write it during yc.
next time.... cultural trip. more suitable for me. like go back to beijing, go xi'an, go yunnan, go mongolia, go harbin... and many many more. cultural trip better...
ok.... better go pack...
ciaoz.....
:)

2006-12-05T21:52:00.000+08:00

hello!!!
i am right in china now.... in hangzhou.
anyone miss me?! -bleh-
hehe......

anyway, i am busy rushing now so others can use the com in an hr. it only cost 2 yuan for an hr. cheapo....
but its better to have to use than not to use.

i am super happy to come. at least, its a big big privillege.
tee.... when u go to beijing, rmb to bring more clothes...thinck clothes! becoz, when i left beijing, the range of temperature goes negative le. everyone was 'smoking'. haha
but it is much more warmer now, becoz i am downwards. way way downwards. and the range now in hangzhou its still at the range of positive. i can wear without my jacket/sweater and go out. rather cooling. 24 hr aircon. tee, if u can see snow, take lots of it. i didn get to see. sigh....

i will rmb to update my blog and post all the funny things....
and hello.... 12 days eh. how to get all in one night?! hehe..... i will do smth about it!

and happy birthday xiang, bert, yun, kevin.
welcome back chest. and bye to you becoz u going to 'prison'. wahahaha....
next time i see u is christmas gathering.

hope all those going to the gathering tmr will be fun... :)

ciaoz babes and hunks....

p.s. moi lurbz u worhz.... (wahahhahahahaha :) )

2006-11-12T03:37:00.000+08:00

tmr i will be going to the arts biennale.
and then i will be taking pictures and look at those wonderful arts.
well, i shall post the pictures in the picture blog as a start.
soon, when i am more free, after Os, then i will post some of the pictures i have last time.
e.g. NPCC, church, outside, home.... blah blah blah.
haha.... i think it would be fun de....

2006-11-10T21:42:00.000+08:00

the picture blog is up!!!

do visit the blog @ http://memopast.blogspot.com

2006-11-10T21:22:00.000+08:00

another new day, another day closer to the end of the O levels!!!
wohoo!!!
this week is the starting of my O papers.
monday was math paper 1 and ss
tuesday was science chem papers 3
wednesday was english and science physics paper 2
thursday have no papers.
today have english paper.

for the past papers, it was terrible!!!
is either cannot finish if not is a lot dunno how to do.
all the papers this week are killer papers. terrible!!!
this is really terrible. except math today.
it is the most satisfying paper this whole week. i managed to finish the paper!!! but there are still quite a few questions i dunno how to do.... the question about angle of elevation and depression.
but i do think that it was quite manageable. and i am quite happy with that.

2006-10-27T02:41:00.000+08:00

what do you say if i am not going to aussie anymore?
go also good. dun go also good.
go i happy, able to study things that i can dun study here.
dun go also happy, able to help out in np and wish to get silver la....
think so much.... ya, mummy say also correct, its not the right time lorh.
sigh... now at this time where to find the courses that i like?! private sch also dun have, poly also dun have. aiya... i also dun really know what i want also.
sigh... i also happy with what GOD gives la. dun complain le lorh...

2006-10-25T19:38:00.000+08:00

aiya... so happi!!!! i am officially 16 le! wohoo. not today la. it was past few days. 22nd oct.
i was so happy. it was one of my best nights, best day i ever had.
when i was young, i can say i dun have friends, no childhood. the onli happy times was when i was with my parents when we go to malaysia. also that time they celebrate my birthday. i can remember.
when i am older, have friends la.... but my family didn care much bah. never celebrate my birthday ever. there was once, it was my birthday but none say happy birthday. i was quiet myself. but then there was once i got slapped. aiya.... but nvm le la.
i was so happi on sunday, big one small one all come. so happy. hehe.
aiya... so happy until my lips cannot be together le la.....

2006-10-18T17:49:00.000+08:00

its a few more days to 16. :)

recently my eye taps are on again. not memories, but problems.

i got an offer for foundation and a 4 week bridging. that means my sch starts on the 3rd of jan. and i most probably cannot stay long till 31 dec. lol. and my parents were discussing about the course and they dun believe in me. nvm lorh. they call the agent and clear their doubts. and then let me go. recently they keep saying and saying and saying about things. taps turn on again. sigh.

nvm la.... i also dun care le. can go can le.
i just think that there is so many reasons for me to go. eventhough i know its hard and rocky, but i still want to go.
sigh.....

anyway, tmr is science prac for O. i kinda study bah. if i compare how much i study and how much my friends study, i think its just one-third of what they are studying.

aiya.... but its ok le lorh. die le lorh. nvm lorh. i think i am back to my relax state again for dunno what heck reasons.

2006-10-07T20:25:00.000+08:00

singapore has lost its sky!!!
so smelly! the air is polluted with a PSI over 100.

let me elaborate to show you my sadnehirdlyss.

at mindnight, the PSI was skyrocketing! it was about 140. but because of the morning dew, the condensation, its PSI dropped.
at about 7 a.m., the PSI was lower than 140. it was recorded 126.
at 10 a.m., the PSI increased. it was recorded 130.
at noon, the PSI was recorded 128, decreases by 2.
at around 1 p.m., the PSI is around 105.
at about 2 p.m., the PSI had dropped to 91.
and now, at 8, the PSI was recorded 143.
___________________________________________________________

The latest satellite pictures showed there were 506 hotspots and thick smoke haze in Sumatra, mainly in Riau, Jambi and South Sumatra, and winds blowing in a southerly to southwesterly direction had brought smoke haze from southern Sumatra to Singapore.

NEA added that the prevailing winds are also transporting the smoke haze towards the Malacca Straits and Peninsular Malaysia. "The prevailing winds are transporting the smoke haze towards the Malacca Straits, Peninsular Malaysia and Singapore," the agency said.

The Malaysian capital Kuala Lumpur on Friday also reported unhealthy air levels, while flights were disrupted in the country's Sarawak province on Borneo island.

A spokesman for Singapore's Changi Airport on Saturday said the haze had not affected operations at the regional aviation hub.

Hundreds of firefighters in Indonesian Borneo, aided by police and volunteers, were Friday dousing illegal forest fires causing acrid haze that blanketed western parts of the island, officials in the neighbouring country said.

Indonesia's annual burn-off causes a haze that typically smothers parts of Malaysia, Singapore and Thailand as well as Indonesia itself.

The NEA advises people with existing heart or respiratory ailments to reduce physical exertion and outdoor activity. - CNA

(article extracted from www.channelnewsasia.com.sg>
____________________________________________________________

now you know why i am so pissed off. i didn even leave the house. but when i sit at the sofa in the living room, the smell of the bad polluted air hast irritated my nose. i have spent most of my time in my room, on my fan to the max to circulate the air in my room.
i am so hungry now. its because of the bad air, and my reluctance to leave the house. its just so smelly now that even i couldn leave my room. soon, i would be dying of suffocation.
the air is now so polluted that even i want to do my part. by using less electricity consumptions. like i would use the fan instead of the aircon. i would watch a smaller tv than my usual tv in the living room. and the worst of all, i think i am in a suana. why? because i shut all doors and windows. its all because of the bad air and the smoky smell. the higher u are the smellier it is. and i live in the 11th floor! help!
anyway, i think i would buy food and ask them deliver. or i going to cook noodles.
so smelly now! and the PSI at 9 p.m. is 150. its bad!

2006-10-06T19:24:00.000+08:00

yesterday was my mum's birthday.
yesterday was my sister's second graduation - for education
yesterday my mum bought a new 400 D camera.

i bet my mum had a great birthday this year.
she paid for more than about 20K for this birthday present. the camera, the cert paper.
what can i say, i love her, more than i could imagine.

today my parents went to mymmar with pastor. the whole time i was praying hard for them.
their safety. mymmar is very very risky now.... all the political troubles and blah blah blah. its so unsafe. and also for those around them, be safe. like for uncle kim teck's father and also my god great grand mother.

i think, reflection is a great thing. because this is when i realise how much i love them, how much i love the people around me. and i should care for them even more now than later when i am or either they are gone. i guess, this is how much God can do to me, to love people. and maybe i should work towards that. hehe. i am thinking of doing smth to it. lol. i will write down my plans when time is near. hehe. :)

2006-10-02T21:36:00.000+08:00

oh my gosh!!!!
do u know now i am indulging into starburst?! my sis post it back from aust. we juz got it yesterday. she opened the box and guess wat? oh my gosh! one side starburst, one side ROC, one side m&m, and one side instant pasta. oh my goodness! dying!
i think i will onli eat those when i am stress, like now, studying.
of course i will not b the one eating it! ><><

2006-10-01T13:43:00.000+08:00

erm... this week it was a kinda stress week.
i rushed the first day to get back all my papers. well, by thursday i had all my papers except english. i reap what i sow. i didn study so i deserved to get these grades. but i am shocked to find out that some i can pass when i do not study, so think, if i had worked on it, then i will have got very good grades.
on thursday i had an interview with bob rees from canning college. sigh. it was bad, and not the one that i want to hear.
then after that, i began to asked questions to myself. like, what so i want to study? what do i want my future to be? what career do i want? what school would i like to go? where do i want to go?
all these questions keep popping up. and summore i got pms, so i'm very down now. adding on, with these stress, i get more down. so i am like... sian arh.
anyway, i juz made the decision to go curtin le. sigh. long story le larh.
when i buy my ticket i will state down when i am flying. :>

2006-09-26T01:26:00.000+08:00

oh wells....
my results weren't that great though. but that shows how much i can do without studying and how much i can do if i had study hard....
all the teachers come to me and commented that they are very dissapointed that i didn got up to their standard, and the first thing they guess and got it right, is i never study. all becoz of dnt, which took up so much of my time. and hello... i started studying only on the 1st of sept... and that is crap! just becoz of dnt!!!
but when thursday comes, i hope the rep from canning can see my good points other than my prelim results. i am anxious for tmr... maths paper! lol
oh, and i had a guest in my house. like i first told ya. her name is michelle foong, all the way from perth. she is always bubbly and very talented in music. she must have taken the genes from her mother.
well, my sister is bringing her out to places in singapore. but she's sick, so its kinda sad. she cannot enjoy that much. sigh. i pray that she can get well soon and she can enjoy the rest of her holidays here.
gotta slp before another fire comes.... sigh

2006-09-22T23:26:00.000+08:00

now i know why i want to leave
now i can find more than 10 reasons why i want to leave
now i finally see that i no longer can stay
msg me if u want to know.
and my last words,
"i will tear him apart! i will go so that i will not come back. i am the next dragon lady. and i will. because i have fire in me, fire that burns me. and i thought that they were my only chance, love would be with me, but apparently not! i will not stay. my decisions is final. like he say, i am independant. i can go through. and i will make her scare of me. I WILL!!! "

2006-09-21T11:01:00.000+08:00

this week.... spring cleaning!!!
not really.... its actually a guest coming to stay and we are like... so-called force to clean up the place.or rather, at least the room she is gonna sleep.
we clean up the room, throw the old bed, wash the place, and my brother make use of the time to restructure his room while cleaning up his room. haha... so did i and my big bro. my mother scolded us for throwing things so..... so..... 'generously'.
the dust!!!! oh my!
i dunno sneezed how many times. and my dad is like so 'allergic' to the dust. that when he comes near to the rooms, he will start sneezing and sneezing and draw out tissues from the tissue box and sneeze into it. my dad is so funny. we dun have a mask... so he took tissue paper cover it over his nose and mouth and use scotchtape to fasten it on his face.... u shld have seen it. its really really funny.
and these few days i have been sleeping around 2, because of the dust in my room, make me unwilling to sleep there.
but yesterday was a havoc. guess what time i sleep. 4.30!!!! in the morning!!!! actually i was suppose to sleep at about 3 plus, after supper with my 2nd bro, sis, and dad.but then some idoit guy came and make a big mess at our trash at the lobby. all our boxes of trash was on the floor. we took sooooooo much time to clean the place and place those trash downstairs. we weren cursing, but we were swearing! swearin that if we noe hu did this, we will slash him to pieces, not practically though. but for i, i will have an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. i will take my chance to do smth. but of coz, i am not that bad. lol. then i came back to bathe and roam around the house.... dying then!
its because we slept super late thats why nobody wake me and my bro up to go to sch. we woke up around 10 and now packing the room. i can't pack my room until my sis move and throw her things. i think we have this sneezing thing all around... the germs..... because everyone is sneezing. imagine, after 6 years in living in this house, and now u are cleaning up?! and u know how thick is the dust. tell me about it..... we are already sneezing like mad here!!! maybe yearly we have to do consistant jobs to clean up our rooms and the house. SO DIRTY!!!

AAhhhhCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... -sorry, can't help-

2006-09-15T21:50:00.000+08:00

this is my very first i am so hurt by my family. first time.
i never had this at all. i always look at the very bright side when it comes to my family. but only when it really hurts me, that is when my tears and mood appear.

i clean up so much because of my sis. she came back today. i was so excited to see her. so i clean up whatever that i can, to make it feel home, cosy, that she never had. but it didn turn out well. not my sister side though, but my bro. i found out that male creatures are one that always hurt me. ya... i think it is. yet it is the male creatures who bring me out of my dark times, moody periods.

i clean up. and i told my bro after fetching my sis from the airport, fetch me to church. nvm, late nvm. but then the only words that hurt me was that he say i was acting holy. wow.... ACTING HOLY!!!! even as i type these words i am crying. hello.... CRYING! and there he is, laughing at his joke. hello. you are my bro. u baptised and then u backslided.... alot! and then?! u got a gf. and u dun go! so be it! but i love to go church. i do! and i go sec 4 friday bible study is because P.Mitch teaches really very encouraging words from GOD that could help me go through this period of time, stress. that is why i start to love to go church. i love it. but u say i am ACTING HOLY?!?!?! fine. take it as I AM! but i wanna tell you that I LOVE THE LORD AND I AM WANTING TO BE HOLY, WANTING TO TRUELY BE THE CHILD OF GOD! and adding on, u r my brother. u know me for almost 16 yrs, and YET u dunno me?! u dunno that.... and u say i ACT HOLY!!!

i cry! i cry because i pity you. i cry because u r backsliding. i cry because u have lost the first love. i cry because u have drifted away for GOD. i cry because u said those words. i cried. and cried. because u hurt me, and u hurt GOD too. and because u have laughed at the seriousness of what the words you have said. i cried.

2006-09-04T16:41:00.000+08:00

1990s' , this post is for you!!!

i know many problems are rising up, like my weird problem here. but no matter what, we still need to get our good grades, do our things well, to glorify the LORD's name. but, dun be too stress like me till i cry like mad. u all see my tears and i see ur stress. but what can we do? remember, the LORD is always there. and as friends with GOD as our center, we can only help each other by praying, by sharing our emotions, by helping each other with GOD. so no matter how much tears u shed, how much sweat you put, how much blood you bleed, GOD is there for you and will never forsake us, unless we forsake Him first. May the LORD bless you all always.

Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; For the LORD upholds him with HIS hand. Psalm 37:24

2006-09-04T16:34:00.000+08:00

15 batch, this is for you!

hey, studying??? me too. even though i can dun need to study, but i wanna to work with u all too for O. i juz wanna say dun b so stress, dun exert too much, dun fall sick, and dun collapse. we are together as one and will always be there for each other. if one falls all of us will too, like that time where we need the help of everyone to hold each other to squat and stand for like lotsa times. if u fall, all of us will. continue to work hard and we will be in the exam hall together. jia you!!!

continue to encourage each other, thats what friends are for. :)

2006-09-04T16:29:00.000+08:00

what can i say..... i can only say now that hey, thanks for reading and understanding me.
i probably could bring these over when i am gone. lol.
afterall, the smiles that all of u have can melt my pain. thats all i want and all i ask. so when i go i hope that u all would smile and send me off, dun cry. coz if u cry, it will want to make me stay even more and slow down my pursue for earthly things.
i really love u all

2006-09-02T00:52:00.000+08:00

i felt your warmth. but your laughters and jokes pricked hardly on my heart.
i have it!
it doesn mean that i dun say it, the number of times i went away and cry would have show it.
how many times do you have to make fun of me when i regard all of u as my very close and very best friends and it will be a forever even till my death arrives. i really love all of you and then somehow that old me just appear again when i am with all of u. loner. never will be the same.
when u need me i was there. but where are you when i need you.
when the paper ball hit me, i couldn't help it but cry. it triggers it. it wasn your fault for throwing it on me. i know. i just need air. i went up, somewhere, crying. i wouldn't want you all to find me. till when i heard the voices where you want to look for me, i cannot help it but cry more. normally my tap wouldn work. but somehow it runs today. no matter how much i tell myself enough, i cannot help it. i sat at the edge, praying hard that you wouldn find me so that i wouldn hurt more, seeing you. the more i see u show that face, the more i wouldn want to let you see my crying face. i wouldn want all of you to worry me. all i want is your smiles. it would just work.
i am afraid. afraid that when i go, all of these would also begone. i will collapse. you all are a gift to me. but i am scared.
no matter how much jokes you can make fun of me, no matter how much you hurt me, i just wanna see your smile.
i was blind today, yet no one helped. i was heartbroken, yet no one see my tears. i was afraid, yet no one see my fear. i am superficial. maybe i am not as an important friend that you can have at all.
my tears are just flowing on and on. but could you wipe it off???
i asked all of you, if one day i would to dissapear, would you come find me? would you find me?
i am really hurt. no matter how many times you have forsaken me, i wouldn want to. i want to be always there for you. that's what i am for my friends.
i love all of you. yet no one i see loves me. i become a laughing stock for you. it hurts. it pricks. what comes tmr? more injuried? no matter how much tears i show you, it wouldn't just make you do something to wipe off. you make no effort to. so be it. i am just happy to see your smiles. all of you, your smiles. i have Him for me in these times. and i need you too, because you are the gifts. yet these gifts show nothing. that hurts more.
it really hurts. really pricks.

2006-08-28T05:49:00.000+08:00

last week was full of ups and downs.

my folio was said until it was like almost worthless. first time he so fierce eh. i was there controlling my tears. dun let one drop roll off. when i tot he was finish, i was packing up and ready to go, he continued to say more. my tears are like all form up le.cannot take it, the tear got so heavy, it just roll down. and then he realise that i was hurt. and then i think he try to talk in a softer tone to calm me down. but.... oh ya.
then again, when i let him check my folio, i think he was vex la. afterall, i was the last. and then he was kinda not feeling well at that time. he also keep saying and saying things about my folio. really, at that time i question myself. i already got a route to overseas le, what for dutte. but then i nudge myself. i say, since i am going to take the exam, might as well do my best. and then these efforts wun go to waste for the past months. that is when my tears got back. after i was scolded then i kinda pek chek. and the brush inside those holes got turpentine. then he scolded me for putting too much varnish. its actually turpentine lorh. coz its like half submerged into the turpentine eh. and i got scolded like tt. then tt time i was like... nvm, dun worry, i can do it. i can get over this. james tried to an wei me. then i say he also stress, can understand de. and its my fault for not doing my folio well. as soon as i leave sch, i took a cab to go church for the sec 4 bible study.

when pastor mitch says about God will uphold you whenever you fall. dunno why, i was tired, i was stress, i was.... everything negative. my tears came. i think al and nat saw it. i juz acted out that i was tired tts all. all the time there i wanted to go toilet and cry this out. but i wanna hear more. after bible study i forced myself to work, work and work. hurry do, hurry wat, hurry finish. then when they order food, me and nat were in the lib doing our work. then i chatted wif him on msn. i ask him, 'what if i were to be mad, what will u do. i think i am on the verge already.' and he didn reply. then i type again. 'i think u all wun do anything bah.' and then i say i going toilet. but actual fact, i went to have a alone time, crying and crying coz i am stress. first time this happen to me. then i hurry wipe my tears. scared they come and see me cry and then they will keep asking why. not that i am afraid of them. but i dun want them to worry about me. then i went back to the lib. but have to go through office. then i hear them practising for teachers day item. then i went to al and i say, 'hey, i not singing with you all for teachers day. i got dnt. deadlines juz 2, 3 days before it. so i wun have time practising.' and he was like, 'ok, dun so stress, you see we get together, not so stress.' at that time, i cry, juz like one drop two drops onli. and i walk away. then i think i heard someone ask al wat happen. and then i heard al say 'you see she so stress, you even see her cry le lorh.' at that time i was like, thanks al, for being so understanding. then i looked up at the sky and i say, the Lord will bring me through difficult times like these. and i smile and continue to do work.

after dinner i hurry rush back to do my work. then later we had a meeting. i was doing my work and was hearing them sing. at that time, their voices soothes my stress. with them and God as the center, the feeling was really good. God really blesses me much. through friends and songs. subsequently, with them, the stress just dissapears.

i wouldn dare to think when that day arrives where i have to go aust and i have to leave them, what would my life be without them. maybe God have a plan for me over there as well. :)

2006-08-24T01:18:00.000+08:00

YEAH!!!!!!!!!

i am kinda happy today. because i have been struggling wether i should take the path to go aussie to study. so i asked God to help. Since he open the route for me, i should take it and get into a whole new experiencing the Lord's grace and mercy.

The Lord has been providing me much. Since the prayer for my grandmother, He has been close to me. My grandmother (father side) along with my granddad (mother side) must have been praying alot for us. See.... a laptop tt i beg my parents for long, suddenly they willing to buy for me, summore good one and expensive one. then peaceful home, then kicked out the theif staying in our hse. then good results for chinese, give me a good and miracle result, distinction for oral and B3 overall. and now, this. my results were like gone case. and then i got both canning and curtin offer. miracle do happen.

Somehow, i feel the happiness doesn't long. I am really afraid that when time comes for me o leave, i am afraid that i will turn back and and regret leaving them there. i will cry till my tap never works. lol.

thats why i am afraid to even think about what will happen then. i just want to see them happily see me leave. then like that i can also smile and leave. lol.

2006-08-10T01:33:00.000+08:00

Happy 41st National Day Singapore!!!

today is 41st birthday of singapore!!!
holiday yet i went to study the whole day. i went to church to study again....
i did material list for like half the day. accidently deleted. i was so pek chek n i cry. but then later tell myself say... muz do it coz got no time. so i try doin it again. better than before.
i actually think that today i didn do much.....
but.... still...

anw, i tmr i will stop studying n doin dnt. coz friday is sc(phy-chem) prelim prac. put myself to a whole day of studying practical. need to do well for it. muz!!

at abt 7 55 we rush up to the roof top to watch the fireworks. the whole 5 minute thing was so funny. we carried chairs n food and rush up. when we r there, 8 flat, we looked towards the west. then cam sit on the rail. then i hug her so she would not fall off. but then we heard the fireworks sound. n guess wat, it was at the east. so we hurry rush to go there. mark, superman, so slow..... 'where?....'o..there!'. goodness.... laughing my head off. tot no more le. then nat n nigel just reach. so we went down to open the gate for them. then we heard the firework sound again.... and we hurry rush up to the rooftop to watch. by the time we were there, it was already over.... then we play truth or dare. many jokes.... fun time. haha. good destressing part.

then i come back home.... then i saw the uncle.... he was tokin to me at the lift. then i was telling him that i was very stress doing work an studying. when i reach my stop.... he say jia you jia you. then i was like... huh. an old man saying this to me. then i started laughing.... and i say to him, i will.

fun day eh....

2006-08-08T20:40:00.000+08:00

hello...
its one day before national day. today singapore have fireworks competition. a lot of people watching.
i never go..... because i need to do my work. so sad.....
i have in total of 4 days more to finish my dnt.
i am currently finishing my dd.
draw n draw..... veri sian.....
then do half-way also dunno why so pek chek...
so i go walk walk... around the church... to kind of destress myself.
i am still in church... still got one more hr to go....
i think... tonite muz chiong again...
good thing i not doing laundry. if not too tired...
currently i did 6 pages of work. feel so proud of myself.
maybe... today target... do at least 10 pages.
by then... almost most of the dd done lerh.
okiez...
go back to my work.
DUN DISTURB!!!!

2006-08-05T01:00:00.000+08:00

today after npcc, the time i spent with them, i went to church. we had bible sudy waith pastor mitch again.
today we learnt about resting on God and to also wait patiently for him from Psalm 37.
resting on God needs a strong foundation of faith and understanding. with that, we can rest on Him and trust in Him. (nice thought)
then as we are in need, we seek for help from God. but sometimes God want us to wait. to wait 1) God want you to learn to have patience. 2) the timing for it is not there yet and 3) a testing of your faith.
with that, you have build up another level call 'character' in Romans 5.(nice thought too)

so i was pondering on it.... and ya. i should cultivate on these both key things i have learnt today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
oh well.... after that we had dinner. and then we discussed about the teachers day prog.
even though half the time we were laughing and joking, but we did have some productivity and at least know when to stop. but it was really funny at times where i couldn stop.
but dunno why, the more tired i get, the more high i am, until i am totally power dead. haha. i keep singing songs like if lets say they say lighthouse, then i would start singing lighthouse. but at least i know when to stop. but seriously, i myself think it was irritating too. but cannot help it la.
i guess everyone slpin lerh. today guess wat time we left church? at least 10p.m!!!
oh my! then i have to walk that freakingly dark alley. i was half the time clenching my fist la. and also freaking out with the bats flying all around the region there. like i said, it was dark.
and when i reach the bus stop, i miss my bus, almost get banged, and this weird indian guy was half the time staring into space like some zombie siahz.
i tell u wat, I TOTALLY FREAKED OUT!!!!
i immediately remembered to trust the LORD for safety. hmm... so guess wat? i start singing songs again to build up my confidence.... miraculously, it works la. answered prayers. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!
when i came back, guess wat time, 11p.m. flat. no more minutes.
goodness. first time not having a car to fetch me in this late night la. n my dad juz say, come back urself la.
i just..... humph!
haha. come back home.... no lights on. then see my bro fwens at the tv there playing PS2. totally frightened me la. no light eh. i tot grandma came back play eh. haha. jk jk.
n guess wat? the clothes are not kept n folded! hello! not my shift la today. i already reach home so late, tired and famished. yet, give me this kind of crap. good shit man.
dun care le.
tmr i juz ask him do. haha.... i feel so evil. hehe

lotsa love

2006-08-05T00:45:00.000+08:00

hmm....
today was kinda special coz it was the 1st OFFICIAL parade the 16th had.
i juz tot i could kinda let go... juz watch a little n just kinda do something else,but, u see.... i can't
dunno why la.
its juz smth that maybe u dun let go.
expecially when i was standing at one corner when i decided to juz watch them open parade and just walk off. but the cadets turned around and great me in honour. they smile to me and even show their teeth. goodness.
it was just merticulously weird that i am not in np anymore yet my presence is always there. the cadets still remembers me and the way i like them.
they dun treat me as aliens now. but a close senior...maybe
i think, this secondary sch in kcp really make me never regret that i join kcp and npcc. because, looking back, many of things we did as a 15th batch was kinda..... dunno how to say la. but we had gain many as well as losing many.
we gain our honour, trust and respect. we gain friendship and relationship in npcc. however, along the way we have to desert away time and rest, friends from u noe other than in np, work that you ought to do.
yet at this time, u also gain to build ur character, and with the change, u also lose many friends with that change.
all in all, i think what i gain is lesser than wat i had lost. coz along the losses, i began to rebuild it in contents to the losses.
longwinded eh....
i think the 16th batch had a great leap towards better leaders.
today, even though i see many wat i dun like.... but i still think, that u all improved much.

love ya all lotsa

2006-08-02T18:10:00.000+08:00

hello... long time nv write le.
i'm in church now.... doing my dnt. sian rite? have to do.... so can pass.... summore muz hand up by next next monday. sian siahz.
i seriously need something to vent all my watever u call.... stress and anger.
am i irritating?!
maybe.....
this has been in my mind for the whole afternoon up till now ah.....
the more i think, the more i get angry and irritated by it. see the irony?
u muz b thinking... then dun think abt it la.
easier said than done.
the more i tell myself not to think, the more i get to think. and the more i get angey n irritated by it. see the second irony?
the whole afternoon i keep printing dnt stuff n still now doing my dnt.
i am getting crazy.
i seriously tell u.... i am going to do something more crazier than wat i am after i hand up my dnt.
i am going to burst out all my stress and start over anew. i need something to make me start new so i can survive more in the upcoming days.
this month will be full of stress. especially when it is the sept holidays.
will be studying studying and studying.
i think its the first time i so stressed up and also so hard working over studies. not even in PSLE.
no.
i am now...... thinking of wat to do to vent out all my stress n anger. i seriously need something now.
and i also think that i am too outgoing. should keep myself to myself more.... then it will b like last time....
sighz.
i dun even want to think about anything now.
nothing!!!!

2006-07-22T02:01:00.000+08:00

this post is for the 16th batch ncos.

ncos, i thank you for thee. the time we had, the fun we shared, the lesson we learn, the hardwork we have.
i just wanna use this opportunity just to wish that you all as the new batch of ncos, you all each have a part to play. i may not be in a important position being a recreation i/c, but i am the one that plan games to bring everyone together, bond with each other for a unity in the unit. no matter how small or how big your role is, u hv a part to play in certain circumstances, esp camp.

as the mentors are not holding u to guide u now, u are free out there to work, to do, to strive, as ONE, for a better tmr of kcpss npcc unit. we may have high expectations to you, but we really hope even more that you all will not only meet these high expectations, but also have the sense of ONE, UNITY, COHESION.

that is my wish for you all.

i shall name this post

For All That We Shared, All That We Had, Bond That we Have, Legacy We Left, Tears That We Shared, Joy That We Had, Laughter We Show, and The Troubles We Care.

best wishes to you all,
praying for all,
the only hunk in th 15th batch,
(sgt) drusilla wong

P.S. I LOVE YOU ALL. if i have time, i will go down and see. any troubles can feel free to find us. I LOVE YOU ALL...

Together Everyone Acheive More (T.E.A.M. 2006)

2006-07-22T01:32:00.000+08:00

happy n sad day of my years in school

today is the day of pop( passing Out Parade). an emotional day, and broke record for being the most emotinonal parade ever. i will always remember this day all the way i go to aussie( that is if i can get there).

today we started with practising our drills, our last march, our last time wearing that uniform, our last time as official ncos. we were really pek chek with some of the irregulars.....nvm. so we carry on.

the parade started.we were standing there ready to march in. thoughts came in to my mind. 'i am passing out. the last time i am going to march, the last parade in np, the last time wearing this uniform, the last time as official ncos, the last time.....of everything.' tears formed in my eyes. thoughts repeatedly came in. then xiang, the pc1, commanded us to march in. i cannot march and wipe tears rite, so i hang it there. then at that time when i see the GOH squad, sec 2s, did better drills than i expected, my tears just gush down. i think the whole parade i was the onli one that tears came down. but sure got people also feel like crying. then shane say those words, i cry even more. of course never make sounds la. then i took the cert and sovenior. i down there dunno to smile, to cry or just to stay cool. and i wiped off my tears before marching to mr low.

after the parade, we went to take lots and lots of photos. we took grp photos. happy moments came in. make me smile, make me laugh. we had refreshments.

after that, we went to see videos. the ncos did a good job. bert, zhi zi, thank u for the effort, and all who helped him, thank u too for making it memorable.

they promise us to make our taps turn on, but it wasn them that make us like that, it was chest's videos. the song, the pictures, the fun, the memories. eventhough i watch the first two tons of times, but i still cry. my tap turn on because i was remembered of those days we had.

apparently, all of us cried except for darren. the ncos, unexpectedly, joshua cry too. that shows we are close to him. evn not as close to them, the sec 1s or sec2s, also cry. i'll miss them, miss the teaching and learning from them. i will miss their smiles and laughter. i will miss their not up to standard drills and campcraft. i will miss their naive attitude. i will miss everything of them.

then it was teechuan's turn. he wanted to let us hear what he dedicated for us on the radio. but it didn work. eventhough he had a veri long speech, but the one i most like is that ' we are true friends. ' yes, we will always be. forever be.

then the closing part, i wanted to say something, but i decided not coz they need to go home to rest.when they leave, i see thir backs, walking away. i then realize, this is no more for me. i no longer am one with them coz i am already retired. i cried.

then closing time, see sue there, reminds me of me the first time there, i start and end the parade. and i commented, ' the last time '. yes, its the last of everything.

then we went to marina south to eat dinner, steamboat cum bbq. we ate to our full. we eat alot and talk alot, had alot of pictures, have alot of fun. until.....

however our fun was somehow trashed, but we still have lots of fun.

maybe one day i should have a post for pictures.

just wanna say, I LOVE MY 15TH BATCH NCOS!!!! I LOVE MY CADETS!!!! I LOVE MY 16TH BATCH NCOS!!!! I LOVE MY CAMPCRAFT COMPETION COMPETITORS THAT TRAINED WITH US AND HAVE FUN!!!!!

I LOVE YOU ALL.

dun make me cry la....... sobz.

2006-07-08T01:09:00.000+08:00

fun day at home

today at home was fun... with few of my np fwens.
they came to my hse.....

at first we wanted to just talk, eat, drink, watch some movies.... who knows that my dvd got problem.

after they eat, they went to my room.... and started to have a pillow fight. i was outside eating... when i came in, DISASTER!!!! my pig bled!!! sad..... i have to do operation on him. the men were lying on top of xiang. yun was sitting there.... watching show. see xiang so ke lian... so i help her.... went on the bed and wrestled too..... fun!

let me see...... we wrestled for quite a few hrs..... lyin on each other, tickling each other...

at the end of the day, coz bert needs to get home, we took super lots of photos. i even took a video cam and take some down..... we took grp photos and many funny funny things. we wrestled too.... coz bert insulted me.

maybe..... when i load in... then link it to let u see.... really funny....

2006-07-06T17:03:00.000+08:00

now..... three blogs in a row.... good eh.....
ok... this blog is my personal feelins..... eh... not really... haha

school started!!!! stress come again....
durin the hols never study much... dun realli regret it... but ya. still got a lil bit.
me for the last one and half wk study can say not a lot... but is smth that i never had done for the past 3 n half yrs. i did hmwk.... surprised???

anw.... i quite enjoy myself... study n play... play n watch tv.... watch n do hmwk.... and blah blah blah....

i suddenly feel super free with time... and then my load on my shoulders had put off and a new one adds on.... i also start to worry alot la

did i tell u i want to go aust to study??? coz i wanna go curtin thts why i wanna study in aust. but now i worry that my parents have to work a lot..... u noe... old ppl.... their body also not veri gd..... so i dun wanna stress them alot mah....

summore.... now i no need go npcc, my load taken off.... but then worries start to come in. however, i definetly have the confidence in them. they will do what they say. and i seriously hope that the results shows what they have worked for. and also the unity and responsibility. at the time of passing np to the sec 3s, i see them change quite alot. like xj, she grow up more.... think more maturely, consider the big picture.... like xiao di.... he also change alot.... to be more responsible and thinking more as a grown up... as a leader..... sad to say... of course they also have a long way to go. they still have more to earn.....

SEC 3s, KAMBATE!!!!!!!

2006-07-06T16:58:00.000+08:00

i still at chest hse.....if u notice....
this issue is for the sec 3 ncos...

sec 3, the 15thbatch ncos will no longer be by your side, guiding u.... bit by bit. However, through this nco life, u will learn more and be able to grow in leadership and many other aspects.... we may not be free or even like last time, oftenly see us, but in times of need, we will stand by you. all in all, we wish u all the best and hope u canexcel and be united in the end. also hope that our legacy can bring u on to make a history for kcp npcc unit....

dru...

2006-07-06T16:55:00.000+08:00

hello..... so long never come and blog le....
i at chest hse now..... nth to do....bored n sian.....
so bo liao....
come n blog....
haha....not funny

2006-05-15T01:20:00.000+08:00

FoR the last week, i keep watching HK cantonese serials. nice shows eh.... some fighting shows, some lovey dovey shows. their storylines not boring at all. really nice. hope i can go HK to go buy the whole TVB shows and watch. haha. better to watch it now than later when i go Aust and then cannot watch. no time and no money. haha.

For the whole week, it was quite relaxing... monday was school. same lah... bored and nth to do. then tuesday was the election thingy holiday for e school. wednesday and thursday is common test. friday is vesak day. saturday super free... went out with chest and huan yun. sunday was free too. see? so free rite?

sunday morning i went church. then we got tok on the subject of 'o' levels. then i told my fwens say that i stress becoz i not stress. muz be thinkin why eh..... from now onwards, i have officially 2 weeks to study for my chinese 'o's. that means i have 336 hours to study. and that meansi have 20160 mins.

with the 336 hrs..... count how long the time for me to study. 336 hours. minus 14x8 hrs to slp. and that is 224 hrs. minus away from 7.30 to 2.30 times 10 days. so that is 154 hrs left. then go to church, 8.30 to 12.30 for 2 days. And that is 150 hrs left. plus all the toilet and bathing..... make it 8 hrs. coz i bathe almost half an hr to an hr everyday. so left 142 hrs to study. minus away the journey go school and come back... an hr everyday..... so minus 14 hrs. so have 128 hrs. then minus away the many times i have to see teachers and stuff. and the school sometimes so idoitic, make us stay back and stuff..... make it 4 hrs.... and that is 124 hrs left..... maybe i forgotten things.... make it another 4 hrs. so onli have 120 hrs left. and that is 5 full days to study. yah.... and that is 7200 mins left or 432,000 seconds left. haha. see.... so little time.

stress becoz i am not stress.......

2006-05-06T08:52:00.000+08:00

YESTERDAY

it was kinda fun yest.after x-country, i went home to bathe and then meet np fwens at bishan s-11. after eating, we went to drink bubble tea. but then xj , pris, bert wants to keep turning until the take tamagochi comes out. lil stupid siahz.then we went to train to dhoby gout to the new cathay. then we watch when the stranger calls.sit beside me was lao da and bert. it was damn cold. good thingg i was wearing shoes and long pants. and i brought my jacket. the movie is damn draggy arh!!! i am like... can u stop calling and hurry up kill her. this is getting draggy. haha.only the last part was thrilling, when the guy wants to kill the lady. i wasn got freaked out by the movie. but by the girls in the theatre who screamed. i wanted to turn to lao da and like.... hug his arm. then i am like...its lao da, so its a no. then i wanted to turn the other side, to bert. then i am like.....NO!!!! so i can only hug myself. i lie down on the seat with the jacket covering half of my face. haha!!! after watching, xj told me she pulled tee'e sleeves and hide behind it when she is scared. i was like..... er, i dun have one for me... then she laughed at me.

yea... cut it short. i dunno why got mood swing la yest.

and shorter. yest went home with xj. we took the same bus. but then she say she dun want to go home so early. so we took the bus all the way to newton circus and then walked to novena and continued to walked to toa payoh. we talked all the way la. just dunno why we suddenly got alot of things to say la.we reached tpy at 9 then walked to interchange. sit beside 145 there and talk and talk. i miss at least 4 bus. we talk until 9.50. then go home. this is wat she requested for me to write. becoz its fun. haha..... -_-!!!

2006-05-03T22:30:00.000+08:00

BACK

yeah! i am back le. i very long nv come and blog...got miss me? hehe. no need to tell me i also know u miss me lah.

anw, last wk i had common test. english, chinese, humanities and dnt. i already got back my chinese and poa this wk. kinda sad though. my chinese just pass and poa just A2 and on the line summore. quite dissapointed though.i got 28 out of 40 for poa. that is 70%. nvm. i must work hard for it!!!

also, for the weekend i go malaysia. i went on saturday. had a ride of life...... one whole day then reach kl. of course got break and everything la. we reach there at12 midnite. then we went to uncle ken's stall... uncle ken is one of my mum's durian supplier. then we stay in an apartment hotel at kl. then we wake up at 10 and eat bak kut teh just downstairs the hotel. after that, we went to pentailing st to buy bargains. my brothers and i bought shoes at super cheap rate. then we went to genting and reach there at evening. the roads were zig zag and steep too. if not wrong, i think its few hundreds feet above sea level. thats high. and higher than the village i went in china.i was like praying super hard so that i wun die there coz i dun want too. when we reach there, we got nth to do. so we went to play arcade. the arcade was super empty la. nth for my age to play. then we went to eat dinner. and after that we meet up with my mother's side relatives. because it was a holiday season, labour day, thats why we didn get to have a room. so we squeeze ourselves at my mother's siblings room. midnight we go play arcade with the kids until 2. my uncle top up too much for the card le. he buy 400 over eh. then teenagers was me, my 2 bros, joanna, and nicholas. 5 of us got free coins so we go 'invest' on the coin thingy to push the coin one. then we 'invest' until we got more that a 1000 tickets. not really alot. then i took the card and go play with joanna, house of the dead. the damn gun i was holding was spoil....waste my money!!! then i go play can get prize one. and i so lucky. always got big big and big. then i got lots of prize. but got one is got one mother see her daughter see i won the bear and then ask me if i can give her. i was shock siah. but i give le. coz it serves no point to me anw. the bear just takes space and left there to collect dust. then my bro suddenly dissapear becoz he go casino. he bring 50RM and won 50RM. that is 100% winning streak eh. u muz be thinking why so little rite? becoz we tell him not to gamble. and even he want to but also cannot get hooked on. and so he brought a little.

ya. then after genting, i had another ride of my life. sit in the car for hrs siah. my butt pain like siao la. i sleep and wake up and watch tv then sleep and wake up and watch tv. all the way until jb. then i got dinner. i keep drinking ching ting. then i wanted one more, my mum say drink too much too cold for ur body, easy to get sick. good thing i didn.

ya. then this wk got x-country. i doin yeoman. yeah!!! no need to walk the thing. damn boring....

i hope all my fwens will pass the common test...

2006-04-23T13:51:00.000+08:00

TIRED

yesterday i watch tv until 3 plus... and surfing on the net. i go see people's blog like chest and jos ang. so updated loh..... anw..... i created this blog yest after i see my fwens blog. i watching this old show call shi gong qi an. some cantonese show. then this is my first entry.

and yest was sec 1 swearing in cermony and si promo. i was there. happy for the sec 1s and also for chest and huan yun and also for fabian. i feel proud for them.

then we went kim san leng and eat. we expected to see lao da and the other cis at s-11. so we went kim san leng to eat. just to avoid them..... fast forward......
yesterday was a fun day la.... a day of reflection. i was quite moody though....
thx fwens.... play bollywood with me and all.