i have like so much time now so i keep posting.
i would be busy from now on.

tommorow i have orientation, then np camp.
then on saturday i will have choir and rehearsal.
sunday, rehearsal again.
and then next week start school.
sigh.... things are getting more and more buzzy here.

more and more practices for easter concert is coming up.
oh well, its good because then i would be more and more familiarised with all the actions and my parts.
i hope to bring my friends, but they would be busy and they will also decline my offer.

with more practices coming up, i have to forsake so many other things.
i am still thinking wether i want to go to np camp.
i tell myself, i have nothing to do with np anymore. so might as well dun go. but then yun wants me to accompany her, so i say ok lorh.
oh well, this would be the first and the last time i would come back as an ex-nco for the camp. and after all these, i would not want to do anything with np anymore other than memories.

alright. i will start let go of everything and pick up more of other things.
lets get it right. everything is bad things and also of the things i dun want to let go. and to pick up new things is to walk in the spirit in christ. so must learn la.
so muz jia you lorh!

jia you!

have anyone written your own fairy tale, with you, yourself as the main character?

fairy tales
they are myths and give one a sense of happiness in reading, hence, its call fairy tales.
it's because these stories would never happen hence, people write them.

fairy tales like cinderella, snow white, and 3 little pigs, gives a happy ending. which fairy tales gives a sad ending.

shows nowadays are like another version of the fairy tale. even to the bad side of it, it gives a sense of happiness, it just wether you choose to look the brighter side. in times of hardship, fairy tales are the best to be written down because it gives a relief and hope to them.

do you believe in this world there is a happy ever after?
you ask me, i would say yes.
in this world, things will vanish one day.
dust to dust, ashes to ashes.
our souls will then either go to heaven or hell, happiness or suffer.
but my believe in the happy ever after is not earthly, but heavenly.
when i die, that is the happy ever after.

my fairy tale story is then...
what is yours?

you are my joy and my pain;
my rest and noise;
my love and my hate.

you made me happy to high skies,
yet you drop me to lower grounds.
you made promises with joy,
yet break them with a smile.

you dissapoint me.
you leave me.
my tears uncontrollably fall with sadness.

you break it.
you slain it.
my heart hurts with streaks of pain.

why this so?

i see him....
its such a long time i see him.
it seems that i had so many things to say to him, but no.

i thought i could see him, talk to him.
no.

i thought that they would be so happy to hear my call.
but no.

life is so experiential.

tears of sadness, tears of joy
crying, laughter
all come round.
but why do humans have to go through all these?
why do we have to go through all these times?

God gave us the chance to live as humans who have feelings.
but also gave us to satan, to test us, and then to let our faith to be genuine and precious as gold. so that one day we would walk on the streets of gold, live in that big mansion, with no day and night, with that joyous praise and worship everyday, everytime. all these trying times are the testings.