Day 1 (Singapore to Beijing)

oh well, the first day is just simply taking a 7 plus hrs of flight to beijing. i reached there about... 2330?! and when we loaded all the things and got to the bus and into our hotel rooms, it was 0030. oh man! thats how big beijing is!!!
i sat at the front sit of the cabin. which is super comfortable, very spacious leg room.... however, i can't play games and do much becoz of the system they had. and by the way, its my first time to support my own airline, SQ!!! it was rather pleasant to have to sit SQ.
The flying was, ichiban!!! aiyoyo!!! when i take off, i dunno i take off. when i touched down, i also dunno. it was just a jerk there and then nth else. that was how good la! SQ pilots are real good. hello?! what u expect from the all no.1 airline and airport la?! we are talking about singapore eh.
the tour guide is xiao li. anyway, its not his name. its just his surname and made easy for everyone to call him that, and more easier to remember. so if u are lost in beijing, shout xiao li, and i think at least 1 out of 10 ppl there will turn to you and ask who u are calling. lol.
when i reached the hotel, we were very very very very very ungry. guess what we did?! right!!! supper! and we walked down this super dark street together to go for a supper. we had mutton steam boat together with fried rice and also handmade noodles. it was... sedap!!! we asked for small portions becoz it was supper. and we were being cheated. when we say small, it is huge to us. and this huge means small to them. if u are thinking of finishing that plate of fried rice yourself, better think twice. becoz it is really huge. you can share with another person la. or maybe two other person too. lol.
after that, we had to go back becoz we have to wake up super duper early for a new day....
more to come! check it out soon. :)

hey!!!
i going home very very very soon..... haha.... in a few hrs time!!!
wahahahahaha.....
finally!!! home sweet home!!! i miss my bed...
-_-!!!
anyway, tmr i will go to yc at church. then the real home sweet home only comes on friday afternoon. haha.
today is super tiring. sleep so little and go out so early. (just becoz they scared they no time to shop and no time to come back and pack.) and it was soooooo nice. why is it nice??? watch out for day 11 of the blog that i will put up. haha.....
i will type some stuff during yc and update after yc for u people to see. :)
riggghhhtt... cut the crap now.
anyway, the next time i come to china.... NO SHANGHAI!!! aiyo... tiring, busy, and eww.... i will write it during yc.
next time.... cultural trip. more suitable for me. like go back to beijing, go xi'an, go yunnan, go mongolia, go harbin... and many many more. cultural trip better...
ok.... better go pack...
ciaoz.....
:)

hello!!!
i am right in china now.... in hangzhou.
anyone miss me?! -bleh-
hehe......

anyway, i am busy rushing now so others can use the com in an hr. it only cost 2 yuan for an hr. cheapo....
but its better to have to use than not to use.

i am super happy to come. at least, its a big big privillege.
tee.... when u go to beijing, rmb to bring more clothes...thinck clothes! becoz, when i left beijing, the range of temperature goes negative le. everyone was 'smoking'. haha
but it is much more warmer now, becoz i am downwards. way way downwards. and the range now in hangzhou its still at the range of positive. i can wear without my jacket/sweater and go out. rather cooling. 24 hr aircon. tee, if u can see snow, take lots of it. i didn get to see. sigh....

i will rmb to update my blog and post all the funny things....
and hello.... 12 days eh. how to get all in one night?! hehe..... i will do smth about it!

and happy birthday xiang, bert, yun, kevin.
welcome back chest. and bye to you becoz u going to 'prison'. wahahaha....
next time i see u is christmas gathering.

hope all those going to the gathering tmr will be fun... :)

ciaoz babes and hunks....

p.s. moi lurbz u worhz.... (wahahhahahahaha :) )

tmr i will be going to the arts biennale.
and then i will be taking pictures and look at those wonderful arts.
well, i shall post the pictures in the picture blog as a start.
soon, when i am more free, after Os, then i will post some of the pictures i have last time.
e.g. NPCC, church, outside, home.... blah blah blah.
haha.... i think it would be fun de....

the picture blog is up!!!

do visit the blog @ http://memopast.blogspot.com

another new day, another day closer to the end of the O levels!!!
wohoo!!!
this week is the starting of my O papers.
monday was math paper 1 and ss
tuesday was science chem papers 3
wednesday was english and science physics paper 2
thursday have no papers.
today have english paper.

for the past papers, it was terrible!!!
is either cannot finish if not is a lot dunno how to do.
all the papers this week are killer papers. terrible!!!
this is really terrible. except math today.
it is the most satisfying paper this whole week. i managed to finish the paper!!! but there are still quite a few questions i dunno how to do.... the question about angle of elevation and depression.
but i do think that it was quite manageable. and i am quite happy with that.

what do you say if i am not going to aussie anymore?
go also good. dun go also good.
go i happy, able to study things that i can dun study here.
dun go also happy, able to help out in np and wish to get silver la....
think so much.... ya, mummy say also correct, its not the right time lorh.
sigh... now at this time where to find the courses that i like?! private sch also dun have, poly also dun have. aiya... i also dun really know what i want also.
sigh... i also happy with what GOD gives la. dun complain le lorh...

aiya... so happi!!!! i am officially 16 le! wohoo. not today la. it was past few days. 22nd oct.
i was so happy. it was one of my best nights, best day i ever had.
when i was young, i can say i dun have friends, no childhood. the onli happy times was when i was with my parents when we go to malaysia. also that time they celebrate my birthday. i can remember.
when i am older, have friends la.... but my family didn care much bah. never celebrate my birthday ever. there was once, it was my birthday but none say happy birthday. i was quiet myself. but then there was once i got slapped. aiya.... but nvm le la.
i was so happi on sunday, big one small one all come. so happy. hehe.
aiya... so happy until my lips cannot be together le la.....

its a few more days to 16. :)

recently my eye taps are on again. not memories, but problems.

i got an offer for foundation and a 4 week bridging. that means my sch starts on the 3rd of jan. and i most probably cannot stay long till 31 dec. lol. and my parents were discussing about the course and they dun believe in me. nvm lorh. they call the agent and clear their doubts. and then let me go. recently they keep saying and saying and saying about things. taps turn on again. sigh.

nvm la.... i also dun care le. can go can le.
i just think that there is so many reasons for me to go. eventhough i know its hard and rocky, but i still want to go.
sigh.....

anyway, tmr is science prac for O. i kinda study bah. if i compare how much i study and how much my friends study, i think its just one-third of what they are studying.

aiya.... but its ok le lorh. die le lorh. nvm lorh. i think i am back to my relax state again for dunno what heck reasons.

singapore has lost its sky!!!
so smelly! the air is polluted with a PSI over 100.

let me elaborate to show you my sadnehirdlyss.

at mindnight, the PSI was skyrocketing! it was about 140. but because of the morning dew, the condensation, its PSI dropped.
at about 7 a.m., the PSI was lower than 140. it was recorded 126.
at 10 a.m., the PSI increased. it was recorded 130.
at noon, the PSI was recorded 128, decreases by 2.
at around 1 p.m., the PSI is around 105.
at about 2 p.m., the PSI had dropped to 91.
and now, at 8, the PSI was recorded 143.
___________________________________________________________

The latest satellite pictures showed there were 506 hotspots and thick smoke haze in Sumatra, mainly in Riau, Jambi and South Sumatra, and winds blowing in a southerly to southwesterly direction had brought smoke haze from southern Sumatra to Singapore.

NEA added that the prevailing winds are also transporting the smoke haze towards the Malacca Straits and Peninsular Malaysia. "The prevailing winds are transporting the smoke haze towards the Malacca Straits, Peninsular Malaysia and Singapore," the agency said.

The Malaysian capital Kuala Lumpur on Friday also reported unhealthy air levels, while flights were disrupted in the country's Sarawak province on Borneo island.

A spokesman for Singapore's Changi Airport on Saturday said the haze had not affected operations at the regional aviation hub.

Hundreds of firefighters in Indonesian Borneo, aided by police and volunteers, were Friday dousing illegal forest fires causing acrid haze that blanketed western parts of the island, officials in the neighbouring country said.

Indonesia's annual burn-off causes a haze that typically smothers parts of Malaysia, Singapore and Thailand as well as Indonesia itself.

The NEA advises people with existing heart or respiratory ailments to reduce physical exertion and outdoor activity. - CNA

(article extracted from www.channelnewsasia.com.sg>
____________________________________________________________

now you know why i am so pissed off. i didn even leave the house. but when i sit at the sofa in the living room, the smell of the bad polluted air hast irritated my nose. i have spent most of my time in my room, on my fan to the max to circulate the air in my room.
i am so hungry now. its because of the bad air, and my reluctance to leave the house. its just so smelly now that even i couldn leave my room. soon, i would be dying of suffocation.
the air is now so polluted that even i want to do my part. by using less electricity consumptions. like i would use the fan instead of the aircon. i would watch a smaller tv than my usual tv in the living room. and the worst of all, i think i am in a suana. why? because i shut all doors and windows. its all because of the bad air and the smoky smell. the higher u are the smellier it is. and i live in the 11th floor! help!
anyway, i think i would buy food and ask them deliver. or i going to cook noodles.
so smelly now! and the PSI at 9 p.m. is 150. its bad!

yesterday was my mum's birthday.
yesterday was my sister's second graduation - for education
yesterday my mum bought a new 400 D camera.

i bet my mum had a great birthday this year.
she paid for more than about 20K for this birthday present. the camera, the cert paper.
what can i say, i love her, more than i could imagine.

today my parents went to mymmar with pastor. the whole time i was praying hard for them.
their safety. mymmar is very very risky now.... all the political troubles and blah blah blah. its so unsafe. and also for those around them, be safe. like for uncle kim teck's father and also my god great grand mother.

i think, reflection is a great thing. because this is when i realise how much i love them, how much i love the people around me. and i should care for them even more now than later when i am or either they are gone. i guess, this is how much God can do to me, to love people. and maybe i should work towards that. hehe. i am thinking of doing smth to it. lol. i will write down my plans when time is near. hehe. :)

oh my gosh!!!!
do u know now i am indulging into starburst?! my sis post it back from aust. we juz got it yesterday. she opened the box and guess wat? oh my gosh! one side starburst, one side ROC, one side m&m, and one side instant pasta. oh my goodness! dying!
i think i will onli eat those when i am stress, like now, studying.
of course i will not b the one eating it! ><><

erm... this week it was a kinda stress week.
i rushed the first day to get back all my papers. well, by thursday i had all my papers except english. i reap what i sow. i didn study so i deserved to get these grades. but i am shocked to find out that some i can pass when i do not study, so think, if i had worked on it, then i will have got very good grades.
on thursday i had an interview with bob rees from canning college. sigh. it was bad, and not the one that i want to hear.
then after that, i began to asked questions to myself. like, what so i want to study? what do i want my future to be? what career do i want? what school would i like to go? where do i want to go?
all these questions keep popping up. and summore i got pms, so i'm very down now. adding on, with these stress, i get more down. so i am like... sian arh.
anyway, i juz made the decision to go curtin le. sigh. long story le larh.
when i buy my ticket i will state down when i am flying. :>

oh wells....
my results weren't that great though. but that shows how much i can do without studying and how much i can do if i had study hard....
all the teachers come to me and commented that they are very dissapointed that i didn got up to their standard, and the first thing they guess and got it right, is i never study. all becoz of dnt, which took up so much of my time. and hello... i started studying only on the 1st of sept... and that is crap! just becoz of dnt!!!
but when thursday comes, i hope the rep from canning can see my good points other than my prelim results. i am anxious for tmr... maths paper! lol
oh, and i had a guest in my house. like i first told ya. her name is michelle foong, all the way from perth. she is always bubbly and very talented in music. she must have taken the genes from her mother.
well, my sister is bringing her out to places in singapore. but she's sick, so its kinda sad. she cannot enjoy that much. sigh. i pray that she can get well soon and she can enjoy the rest of her holidays here.
gotta slp before another fire comes.... sigh

now i know why i want to leave
now i can find more than 10 reasons why i want to leave
now i finally see that i no longer can stay
msg me if u want to know.
and my last words,
"i will tear him apart! i will go so that i will not come back. i am the next dragon lady. and i will. because i have fire in me, fire that burns me. and i thought that they were my only chance, love would be with me, but apparently not! i will not stay. my decisions is final. like he say, i am independant. i can go through. and i will make her scare of me. I WILL!!! "

this week.... spring cleaning!!!
not really.... its actually a guest coming to stay and we are like... so-called force to clean up the place.or rather, at least the room she is gonna sleep.
we clean up the room, throw the old bed, wash the place, and my brother make use of the time to restructure his room while cleaning up his room. haha... so did i and my big bro. my mother scolded us for throwing things so..... so..... 'generously'.
the dust!!!! oh my!
i dunno sneezed how many times. and my dad is like so 'allergic' to the dust. that when he comes near to the rooms, he will start sneezing and sneezing and draw out tissues from the tissue box and sneeze into it. my dad is so funny. we dun have a mask... so he took tissue paper cover it over his nose and mouth and use scotchtape to fasten it on his face.... u shld have seen it. its really really funny.
and these few days i have been sleeping around 2, because of the dust in my room, make me unwilling to sleep there.
but yesterday was a havoc. guess what time i sleep. 4.30!!!! in the morning!!!! actually i was suppose to sleep at about 3 plus, after supper with my 2nd bro, sis, and dad.but then some idoit guy came and make a big mess at our trash at the lobby. all our boxes of trash was on the floor. we took sooooooo much time to clean the place and place those trash downstairs. we weren cursing, but we were swearing! swearin that if we noe hu did this, we will slash him to pieces, not practically though. but for i, i will have an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. i will take my chance to do smth. but of coz, i am not that bad. lol. then i came back to bathe and roam around the house.... dying then!
its because we slept super late thats why nobody wake me and my bro up to go to sch. we woke up around 10 and now packing the room. i can't pack my room until my sis move and throw her things. i think we have this sneezing thing all around... the germs..... because everyone is sneezing. imagine, after 6 years in living in this house, and now u are cleaning up?! and u know how thick is the dust. tell me about it..... we are already sneezing like mad here!!! maybe yearly we have to do consistant jobs to clean up our rooms and the house. SO DIRTY!!!

AAhhhhCHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... -sorry, can't help-

this is my very first i am so hurt by my family. first time.
i never had this at all. i always look at the very bright side when it comes to my family. but only when it really hurts me, that is when my tears and mood appear.

i clean up so much because of my sis. she came back today. i was so excited to see her. so i clean up whatever that i can, to make it feel home, cosy, that she never had. but it didn turn out well. not my sister side though, but my bro. i found out that male creatures are one that always hurt me. ya... i think it is. yet it is the male creatures who bring me out of my dark times, moody periods.

i clean up. and i told my bro after fetching my sis from the airport, fetch me to church. nvm, late nvm. but then the only words that hurt me was that he say i was acting holy. wow.... ACTING HOLY!!!! even as i type these words i am crying. hello.... CRYING! and there he is, laughing at his joke. hello. you are my bro. u baptised and then u backslided.... alot! and then?! u got a gf. and u dun go! so be it! but i love to go church. i do! and i go sec 4 friday bible study is because P.Mitch teaches really very encouraging words from GOD that could help me go through this period of time, stress. that is why i start to love to go church. i love it. but u say i am ACTING HOLY?!?!?! fine. take it as I AM! but i wanna tell you that I LOVE THE LORD AND I AM WANTING TO BE HOLY, WANTING TO TRUELY BE THE CHILD OF GOD! and adding on, u r my brother. u know me for almost 16 yrs, and YET u dunno me?! u dunno that.... and u say i ACT HOLY!!!

i cry! i cry because i pity you. i cry because u r backsliding. i cry because u have lost the first love. i cry because u have drifted away for GOD. i cry because u said those words. i cried. and cried. because u hurt me, and u hurt GOD too. and because u have laughed at the seriousness of what the words you have said. i cried.

1990s' , this post is for you!!!

i know many problems are rising up, like my weird problem here. but no matter what, we still need to get our good grades, do our things well, to glorify the LORD's name. but, dun be too stress like me till i cry like mad. u all see my tears and i see ur stress. but what can we do? remember, the LORD is always there. and as friends with GOD as our center, we can only help each other by praying, by sharing our emotions, by helping each other with GOD. so no matter how much tears u shed, how much sweat you put, how much blood you bleed, GOD is there for you and will never forsake us, unless we forsake Him first. May the LORD bless you all always.

Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down; For the LORD upholds him with HIS hand. Psalm 37:24

15 batch, this is for you!

hey, studying??? me too. even though i can dun need to study, but i wanna to work with u all too for O. i juz wanna say dun b so stress, dun exert too much, dun fall sick, and dun collapse. we are together as one and will always be there for each other. if one falls all of us will too, like that time where we need the help of everyone to hold each other to squat and stand for like lotsa times. if u fall, all of us will. continue to work hard and we will be in the exam hall together. jia you!!!

continue to encourage each other, thats what friends are for. :)

what can i say..... i can only say now that hey, thanks for reading and understanding me.
i probably could bring these over when i am gone. lol.
afterall, the smiles that all of u have can melt my pain. thats all i want and all i ask. so when i go i hope that u all would smile and send me off, dun cry. coz if u cry, it will want to make me stay even more and slow down my pursue for earthly things.
i really love u all

i felt your warmth. but your laughters and jokes pricked hardly on my heart.
i have it!
it doesn mean that i dun say it, the number of times i went away and cry would have show it.
how many times do you have to make fun of me when i regard all of u as my very close and very best friends and it will be a forever even till my death arrives. i really love all of you and then somehow that old me just appear again when i am with all of u. loner. never will be the same.
when u need me i was there. but where are you when i need you.
when the paper ball hit me, i couldn't help it but cry. it triggers it. it wasn your fault for throwing it on me. i know. i just need air. i went up, somewhere, crying. i wouldn't want you all to find me. till when i heard the voices where you want to look for me, i cannot help it but cry more. normally my tap wouldn work. but somehow it runs today. no matter how much i tell myself enough, i cannot help it. i sat at the edge, praying hard that you wouldn find me so that i wouldn hurt more, seeing you. the more i see u show that face, the more i wouldn want to let you see my crying face. i wouldn want all of you to worry me. all i want is your smiles. it would just work.
i am afraid. afraid that when i go, all of these would also begone. i will collapse. you all are a gift to me. but i am scared.
no matter how much jokes you can make fun of me, no matter how much you hurt me, i just wanna see your smile.
i was blind today, yet no one helped. i was heartbroken, yet no one see my tears. i was afraid, yet no one see my fear. i am superficial. maybe i am not as an important friend that you can have at all.
my tears are just flowing on and on. but could you wipe it off???
i asked all of you, if one day i would to dissapear, would you come find me? would you find me?
i am really hurt. no matter how many times you have forsaken me, i wouldn want to. i want to be always there for you. that's what i am for my friends.
i love all of you. yet no one i see loves me. i become a laughing stock for you. it hurts. it pricks. what comes tmr? more injuried? no matter how much tears i show you, it wouldn't just make you do something to wipe off. you make no effort to. so be it. i am just happy to see your smiles. all of you, your smiles. i have Him for me in these times. and i need you too, because you are the gifts. yet these gifts show nothing. that hurts more.
it really hurts. really pricks.

last week was full of ups and downs.

my folio was said until it was like almost worthless. first time he so fierce eh. i was there controlling my tears. dun let one drop roll off. when i tot he was finish, i was packing up and ready to go, he continued to say more. my tears are like all form up le.cannot take it, the tear got so heavy, it just roll down. and then he realise that i was hurt. and then i think he try to talk in a softer tone to calm me down. but.... oh ya.
then again, when i let him check my folio, i think he was vex la. afterall, i was the last. and then he was kinda not feeling well at that time. he also keep saying and saying things about my folio. really, at that time i question myself. i already got a route to overseas le, what for dutte. but then i nudge myself. i say, since i am going to take the exam, might as well do my best. and then these efforts wun go to waste for the past months. that is when my tears got back. after i was scolded then i kinda pek chek. and the brush inside those holes got turpentine. then he scolded me for putting too much varnish. its actually turpentine lorh. coz its like half submerged into the turpentine eh. and i got scolded like tt. then tt time i was like... nvm, dun worry, i can do it. i can get over this. james tried to an wei me. then i say he also stress, can understand de. and its my fault for not doing my folio well. as soon as i leave sch, i took a cab to go church for the sec 4 bible study.

when pastor mitch says about God will uphold you whenever you fall. dunno why, i was tired, i was stress, i was.... everything negative. my tears came. i think al and nat saw it. i juz acted out that i was tired tts all. all the time there i wanted to go toilet and cry this out. but i wanna hear more. after bible study i forced myself to work, work and work. hurry do, hurry wat, hurry finish. then when they order food, me and nat were in the lib doing our work. then i chatted wif him on msn. i ask him, 'what if i were to be mad, what will u do. i think i am on the verge already.' and he didn reply. then i type again. 'i think u all wun do anything bah.' and then i say i going toilet. but actual fact, i went to have a alone time, crying and crying coz i am stress. first time this happen to me. then i hurry wipe my tears. scared they come and see me cry and then they will keep asking why. not that i am afraid of them. but i dun want them to worry about me. then i went back to the lib. but have to go through office. then i hear them practising for teachers day item. then i went to al and i say, 'hey, i not singing with you all for teachers day. i got dnt. deadlines juz 2, 3 days before it. so i wun have time practising.' and he was like, 'ok, dun so stress, you see we get together, not so stress.' at that time, i cry, juz like one drop two drops onli. and i walk away. then i think i heard someone ask al wat happen. and then i heard al say 'you see she so stress, you even see her cry le lorh.' at that time i was like, thanks al, for being so understanding. then i looked up at the sky and i say, the Lord will bring me through difficult times like these. and i smile and continue to do work.

after dinner i hurry rush back to do my work. then later we had a meeting. i was doing my work and was hearing them sing. at that time, their voices soothes my stress. with them and God as the center, the feeling was really good. God really blesses me much. through friends and songs. subsequently, with them, the stress just dissapears.

i wouldn dare to think when that day arrives where i have to go aust and i have to leave them, what would my life be without them. maybe God have a plan for me over there as well. :)

YEAH!!!!!!!!!

i am kinda happy today. because i have been struggling wether i should take the path to go aussie to study. so i asked God to help. Since he open the route for me, i should take it and get into a whole new experiencing the Lord's grace and mercy.

The Lord has been providing me much. Since the prayer for my grandmother, He has been close to me. My grandmother (father side) along with my granddad (mother side) must have been praying alot for us. See.... a laptop tt i beg my parents for long, suddenly they willing to buy for me, summore good one and expensive one. then peaceful home, then kicked out the theif staying in our hse. then good results for chinese, give me a good and miracle result, distinction for oral and B3 overall. and now, this. my results were like gone case. and then i got both canning and curtin offer. miracle do happen.

Somehow, i feel the happiness doesn't long. I am really afraid that when time comes for me o leave, i am afraid that i will turn back and and regret leaving them there. i will cry till my tap never works. lol.

thats why i am afraid to even think about what will happen then. i just want to see them happily see me leave. then like that i can also smile and leave. lol.

Happy 41st National Day Singapore!!!

today is 41st birthday of singapore!!!
holiday yet i went to study the whole day. i went to church to study again....
i did material list for like half the day. accidently deleted. i was so pek chek n i cry. but then later tell myself say... muz do it coz got no time. so i try doin it again. better than before.
i actually think that today i didn do much.....
but.... still...

anw, i tmr i will stop studying n doin dnt. coz friday is sc(phy-chem) prelim prac. put myself to a whole day of studying practical. need to do well for it. muz!!

at abt 7 55 we rush up to the roof top to watch the fireworks. the whole 5 minute thing was so funny. we carried chairs n food and rush up. when we r there, 8 flat, we looked towards the west. then cam sit on the rail. then i hug her so she would not fall off. but then we heard the fireworks sound. n guess wat, it was at the east. so we hurry rush to go there. mark, superman, so slow..... 'where?....'o..there!'. goodness.... laughing my head off. tot no more le. then nat n nigel just reach. so we went down to open the gate for them. then we heard the firework sound again.... and we hurry rush up to the rooftop to watch. by the time we were there, it was already over.... then we play truth or dare. many jokes.... fun time. haha. good destressing part.

then i come back home.... then i saw the uncle.... he was tokin to me at the lift. then i was telling him that i was very stress doing work an studying. when i reach my stop.... he say jia you jia you. then i was like... huh. an old man saying this to me. then i started laughing.... and i say to him, i will.

fun day eh....

hello...
its one day before national day. today singapore have fireworks competition. a lot of people watching.
i never go..... because i need to do my work. so sad.....
i have in total of 4 days more to finish my dnt.
i am currently finishing my dd.
draw n draw..... veri sian.....
then do half-way also dunno why so pek chek...
so i go walk walk... around the church... to kind of destress myself.
i am still in church... still got one more hr to go....
i think... tonite muz chiong again...
good thing i not doing laundry. if not too tired...
currently i did 6 pages of work. feel so proud of myself.
maybe... today target... do at least 10 pages.
by then... almost most of the dd done lerh.
okiez...
go back to my work.
DUN DISTURB!!!!

today after npcc, the time i spent with them, i went to church. we had bible sudy waith pastor mitch again.
today we learnt about resting on God and to also wait patiently for him from Psalm 37.
resting on God needs a strong foundation of faith and understanding. with that, we can rest on Him and trust in Him. (nice thought)
then as we are in need, we seek for help from God. but sometimes God want us to wait. to wait 1) God want you to learn to have patience. 2) the timing for it is not there yet and 3) a testing of your faith.
with that, you have build up another level call 'character' in Romans 5.(nice thought too)

so i was pondering on it.... and ya. i should cultivate on these both key things i have learnt today.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
oh well.... after that we had dinner. and then we discussed about the teachers day prog.
even though half the time we were laughing and joking, but we did have some productivity and at least know when to stop. but it was really funny at times where i couldn stop.
but dunno why, the more tired i get, the more high i am, until i am totally power dead. haha. i keep singing songs like if lets say they say lighthouse, then i would start singing lighthouse. but at least i know when to stop. but seriously, i myself think it was irritating too. but cannot help it la.
i guess everyone slpin lerh. today guess wat time we left church? at least 10p.m!!!
oh my! then i have to walk that freakingly dark alley. i was half the time clenching my fist la. and also freaking out with the bats flying all around the region there. like i said, it was dark.
and when i reach the bus stop, i miss my bus, almost get banged, and this weird indian guy was half the time staring into space like some zombie siahz.
i tell u wat, I TOTALLY FREAKED OUT!!!!
i immediately remembered to trust the LORD for safety. hmm... so guess wat? i start singing songs again to build up my confidence.... miraculously, it works la. answered prayers. PRAISE THE LORD!!!!
when i came back, guess wat time, 11p.m. flat. no more minutes.
goodness. first time not having a car to fetch me in this late night la. n my dad juz say, come back urself la.
i just..... humph!
haha. come back home.... no lights on. then see my bro fwens at the tv there playing PS2. totally frightened me la. no light eh. i tot grandma came back play eh. haha. jk jk.
n guess wat? the clothes are not kept n folded! hello! not my shift la today. i already reach home so late, tired and famished. yet, give me this kind of crap. good shit man.
dun care le.
tmr i juz ask him do. haha.... i feel so evil. hehe

lotsa love

hmm....
today was kinda special coz it was the 1st OFFICIAL parade the 16th had.
i juz tot i could kinda let go... juz watch a little n just kinda do something else,but, u see.... i can't
dunno why la.
its juz smth that maybe u dun let go.
expecially when i was standing at one corner when i decided to juz watch them open parade and just walk off. but the cadets turned around and great me in honour. they smile to me and even show their teeth. goodness.
it was just merticulously weird that i am not in np anymore yet my presence is always there. the cadets still remembers me and the way i like them.
they dun treat me as aliens now. but a close senior...maybe
i think, this secondary sch in kcp really make me never regret that i join kcp and npcc. because, looking back, many of things we did as a 15th batch was kinda..... dunno how to say la. but we had gain many as well as losing many.
we gain our honour, trust and respect. we gain friendship and relationship in npcc. however, along the way we have to desert away time and rest, friends from u noe other than in np, work that you ought to do.
yet at this time, u also gain to build ur character, and with the change, u also lose many friends with that change.
all in all, i think what i gain is lesser than wat i had lost. coz along the losses, i began to rebuild it in contents to the losses.
longwinded eh....
i think the 16th batch had a great leap towards better leaders.
today, even though i see many wat i dun like.... but i still think, that u all improved much.

love ya all lotsa

hello... long time nv write le.
i'm in church now.... doing my dnt. sian rite? have to do.... so can pass.... summore muz hand up by next next monday. sian siahz.
i seriously need something to vent all my watever u call.... stress and anger.
am i irritating?!
maybe.....
this has been in my mind for the whole afternoon up till now ah.....
the more i think, the more i get angry and irritated by it. see the irony?
u muz b thinking... then dun think abt it la.
easier said than done.
the more i tell myself not to think, the more i get to think. and the more i get angey n irritated by it. see the second irony?
the whole afternoon i keep printing dnt stuff n still now doing my dnt.
i am getting crazy.
i seriously tell u.... i am going to do something more crazier than wat i am after i hand up my dnt.
i am going to burst out all my stress and start over anew. i need something to make me start new so i can survive more in the upcoming days.
this month will be full of stress. especially when it is the sept holidays.
will be studying studying and studying.
i think its the first time i so stressed up and also so hard working over studies. not even in PSLE.
no.
i am now...... thinking of wat to do to vent out all my stress n anger. i seriously need something now.
and i also think that i am too outgoing. should keep myself to myself more.... then it will b like last time....
sighz.
i dun even want to think about anything now.
nothing!!!!

this post is for the 16th batch ncos.

ncos, i thank you for thee. the time we had, the fun we shared, the lesson we learn, the hardwork we have.
i just wanna use this opportunity just to wish that you all as the new batch of ncos, you all each have a part to play. i may not be in a important position being a recreation i/c, but i am the one that plan games to bring everyone together, bond with each other for a unity in the unit. no matter how small or how big your role is, u hv a part to play in certain circumstances, esp camp.

as the mentors are not holding u to guide u now, u are free out there to work, to do, to strive, as ONE, for a better tmr of kcpss npcc unit. we may have high expectations to you, but we really hope even more that you all will not only meet these high expectations, but also have the sense of ONE, UNITY, COHESION.

that is my wish for you all.

i shall name this post

For All That We Shared, All That We Had, Bond That we Have, Legacy We Left, Tears That We Shared, Joy That We Had, Laughter We Show, and The Troubles We Care.

best wishes to you all,
praying for all,
the only hunk in th 15th batch,
(sgt) drusilla wong

P.S. I LOVE YOU ALL. if i have time, i will go down and see. any troubles can feel free to find us. I LOVE YOU ALL...

Together Everyone Acheive More (T.E.A.M. 2006)

happy n sad day of my years in school

today is the day of pop( passing Out Parade). an emotional day, and broke record for being the most emotinonal parade ever. i will always remember this day all the way i go to aussie( that is if i can get there).

today we started with practising our drills, our last march, our last time wearing that uniform, our last time as official ncos. we were really pek chek with some of the irregulars.....nvm. so we carry on.

the parade started.we were standing there ready to march in. thoughts came in to my mind. 'i am passing out. the last time i am going to march, the last parade in np, the last time wearing this uniform, the last time as official ncos, the last time.....of everything.' tears formed in my eyes. thoughts repeatedly came in. then xiang, the pc1, commanded us to march in. i cannot march and wipe tears rite, so i hang it there. then at that time when i see the GOH squad, sec 2s, did better drills than i expected, my tears just gush down. i think the whole parade i was the onli one that tears came down. but sure got people also feel like crying. then shane say those words, i cry even more. of course never make sounds la. then i took the cert and sovenior. i down there dunno to smile, to cry or just to stay cool. and i wiped off my tears before marching to mr low.

after the parade, we went to take lots and lots of photos. we took grp photos. happy moments came in. make me smile, make me laugh. we had refreshments.

after that, we went to see videos. the ncos did a good job. bert, zhi zi, thank u for the effort, and all who helped him, thank u too for making it memorable.

they promise us to make our taps turn on, but it wasn them that make us like that, it was chest's videos. the song, the pictures, the fun, the memories. eventhough i watch the first two tons of times, but i still cry. my tap turn on because i was remembered of those days we had.

apparently, all of us cried except for darren. the ncos, unexpectedly, joshua cry too. that shows we are close to him. evn not as close to them, the sec 1s or sec2s, also cry. i'll miss them, miss the teaching and learning from them. i will miss their smiles and laughter. i will miss their not up to standard drills and campcraft. i will miss their naive attitude. i will miss everything of them.

then it was teechuan's turn. he wanted to let us hear what he dedicated for us on the radio. but it didn work. eventhough he had a veri long speech, but the one i most like is that ' we are true friends. ' yes, we will always be. forever be.

then the closing part, i wanted to say something, but i decided not coz they need to go home to rest.when they leave, i see thir backs, walking away. i then realize, this is no more for me. i no longer am one with them coz i am already retired. i cried.

then closing time, see sue there, reminds me of me the first time there, i start and end the parade. and i commented, ' the last time '. yes, its the last of everything.

then we went to marina south to eat dinner, steamboat cum bbq. we ate to our full. we eat alot and talk alot, had alot of pictures, have alot of fun. until.....

however our fun was somehow trashed, but we still have lots of fun.

maybe one day i should have a post for pictures.

just wanna say, I LOVE MY 15TH BATCH NCOS!!!! I LOVE MY CADETS!!!! I LOVE MY 16TH BATCH NCOS!!!! I LOVE MY CAMPCRAFT COMPETION COMPETITORS THAT TRAINED WITH US AND HAVE FUN!!!!!

I LOVE YOU ALL.

dun make me cry la....... sobz.

fun day at home

today at home was fun... with few of my np fwens.
they came to my hse.....

at first we wanted to just talk, eat, drink, watch some movies.... who knows that my dvd got problem.

after they eat, they went to my room.... and started to have a pillow fight. i was outside eating... when i came in, DISASTER!!!! my pig bled!!! sad..... i have to do operation on him. the men were lying on top of xiang. yun was sitting there.... watching show. see xiang so ke lian... so i help her.... went on the bed and wrestled too..... fun!

let me see...... we wrestled for quite a few hrs..... lyin on each other, tickling each other...

at the end of the day, coz bert needs to get home, we took super lots of photos. i even took a video cam and take some down..... we took grp photos and many funny funny things. we wrestled too.... coz bert insulted me.

maybe..... when i load in... then link it to let u see.... really funny....

now..... three blogs in a row.... good eh.....
ok... this blog is my personal feelins..... eh... not really... haha

school started!!!! stress come again....
durin the hols never study much... dun realli regret it... but ya. still got a lil bit.
me for the last one and half wk study can say not a lot... but is smth that i never had done for the past 3 n half yrs. i did hmwk.... surprised???

anw.... i quite enjoy myself... study n play... play n watch tv.... watch n do hmwk.... and blah blah blah....

i suddenly feel super free with time... and then my load on my shoulders had put off and a new one adds on.... i also start to worry alot la

did i tell u i want to go aust to study??? coz i wanna go curtin thts why i wanna study in aust. but now i worry that my parents have to work a lot..... u noe... old ppl.... their body also not veri gd..... so i dun wanna stress them alot mah....

summore.... now i no need go npcc, my load taken off.... but then worries start to come in. however, i definetly have the confidence in them. they will do what they say. and i seriously hope that the results shows what they have worked for. and also the unity and responsibility. at the time of passing np to the sec 3s, i see them change quite alot. like xj, she grow up more.... think more maturely, consider the big picture.... like xiao di.... he also change alot.... to be more responsible and thinking more as a grown up... as a leader..... sad to say... of course they also have a long way to go. they still have more to earn.....

SEC 3s, KAMBATE!!!!!!!

i still at chest hse.....if u notice....
this issue is for the sec 3 ncos...

sec 3, the 15thbatch ncos will no longer be by your side, guiding u.... bit by bit. However, through this nco life, u will learn more and be able to grow in leadership and many other aspects.... we may not be free or even like last time, oftenly see us, but in times of need, we will stand by you. all in all, we wish u all the best and hope u canexcel and be united in the end. also hope that our legacy can bring u on to make a history for kcp npcc unit....

dru...

hello..... so long never come and blog le....
i at chest hse now..... nth to do....bored n sian.....
so bo liao....
come n blog....
haha....not funny

FoR the last week, i keep watching HK cantonese serials. nice shows eh.... some fighting shows, some lovey dovey shows. their storylines not boring at all. really nice. hope i can go HK to go buy the whole TVB shows and watch. haha. better to watch it now than later when i go Aust and then cannot watch. no time and no money. haha.

For the whole week, it was quite relaxing... monday was school. same lah... bored and nth to do. then tuesday was the election thingy holiday for e school. wednesday and thursday is common test. friday is vesak day. saturday super free... went out with chest and huan yun. sunday was free too. see? so free rite?

sunday morning i went church. then we got tok on the subject of 'o' levels. then i told my fwens say that i stress becoz i not stress. muz be thinkin why eh..... from now onwards, i have officially 2 weeks to study for my chinese 'o's. that means i have 336 hours to study. and that meansi have 20160 mins.

with the 336 hrs..... count how long the time for me to study. 336 hours. minus 14x8 hrs to slp. and that is 224 hrs. minus away from 7.30 to 2.30 times 10 days. so that is 154 hrs left. then go to church, 8.30 to 12.30 for 2 days. And that is 150 hrs left. plus all the toilet and bathing..... make it 8 hrs. coz i bathe almost half an hr to an hr everyday. so left 142 hrs to study. minus away the journey go school and come back... an hr everyday..... so minus 14 hrs. so have 128 hrs. then minus away the many times i have to see teachers and stuff. and the school sometimes so idoitic, make us stay back and stuff..... make it 4 hrs.... and that is 124 hrs left..... maybe i forgotten things.... make it another 4 hrs. so onli have 120 hrs left. and that is 5 full days to study. yah.... and that is 7200 mins left or 432,000 seconds left. haha. see.... so little time.

stress becoz i am not stress.......

YESTERDAY

it was kinda fun yest.after x-country, i went home to bathe and then meet np fwens at bishan s-11. after eating, we went to drink bubble tea. but then xj , pris, bert wants to keep turning until the take tamagochi comes out. lil stupid siahz.then we went to train to dhoby gout to the new cathay. then we watch when the stranger calls.sit beside me was lao da and bert. it was damn cold. good thingg i was wearing shoes and long pants. and i brought my jacket. the movie is damn draggy arh!!! i am like... can u stop calling and hurry up kill her. this is getting draggy. haha.only the last part was thrilling, when the guy wants to kill the lady. i wasn got freaked out by the movie. but by the girls in the theatre who screamed. i wanted to turn to lao da and like.... hug his arm. then i am like...its lao da, so its a no. then i wanted to turn the other side, to bert. then i am like.....NO!!!! so i can only hug myself. i lie down on the seat with the jacket covering half of my face. haha!!! after watching, xj told me she pulled tee'e sleeves and hide behind it when she is scared. i was like..... er, i dun have one for me... then she laughed at me.

yea... cut it short. i dunno why got mood swing la yest.

and shorter. yest went home with xj. we took the same bus. but then she say she dun want to go home so early. so we took the bus all the way to newton circus and then walked to novena and continued to walked to toa payoh. we talked all the way la. just dunno why we suddenly got alot of things to say la.we reached tpy at 9 then walked to interchange. sit beside 145 there and talk and talk. i miss at least 4 bus. we talk until 9.50. then go home. this is wat she requested for me to write. becoz its fun. haha..... -_-!!!

BACK

yeah! i am back le. i very long nv come and blog...got miss me? hehe. no need to tell me i also know u miss me lah.

anw, last wk i had common test. english, chinese, humanities and dnt. i already got back my chinese and poa this wk. kinda sad though. my chinese just pass and poa just A2 and on the line summore. quite dissapointed though.i got 28 out of 40 for poa. that is 70%. nvm. i must work hard for it!!!

also, for the weekend i go malaysia. i went on saturday. had a ride of life...... one whole day then reach kl. of course got break and everything la. we reach there at12 midnite. then we went to uncle ken's stall... uncle ken is one of my mum's durian supplier. then we stay in an apartment hotel at kl. then we wake up at 10 and eat bak kut teh just downstairs the hotel. after that, we went to pentailing st to buy bargains. my brothers and i bought shoes at super cheap rate. then we went to genting and reach there at evening. the roads were zig zag and steep too. if not wrong, i think its few hundreds feet above sea level. thats high. and higher than the village i went in china.i was like praying super hard so that i wun die there coz i dun want too. when we reach there, we got nth to do. so we went to play arcade. the arcade was super empty la. nth for my age to play. then we went to eat dinner. and after that we meet up with my mother's side relatives. because it was a holiday season, labour day, thats why we didn get to have a room. so we squeeze ourselves at my mother's siblings room. midnight we go play arcade with the kids until 2. my uncle top up too much for the card le. he buy 400 over eh. then teenagers was me, my 2 bros, joanna, and nicholas. 5 of us got free coins so we go 'invest' on the coin thingy to push the coin one. then we 'invest' until we got more that a 1000 tickets. not really alot. then i took the card and go play with joanna, house of the dead. the damn gun i was holding was spoil....waste my money!!! then i go play can get prize one. and i so lucky. always got big big and big. then i got lots of prize. but got one is got one mother see her daughter see i won the bear and then ask me if i can give her. i was shock siah. but i give le. coz it serves no point to me anw. the bear just takes space and left there to collect dust. then my bro suddenly dissapear becoz he go casino. he bring 50RM and won 50RM. that is 100% winning streak eh. u muz be thinking why so little rite? becoz we tell him not to gamble. and even he want to but also cannot get hooked on. and so he brought a little.

ya. then after genting, i had another ride of my life. sit in the car for hrs siah. my butt pain like siao la. i sleep and wake up and watch tv then sleep and wake up and watch tv. all the way until jb. then i got dinner. i keep drinking ching ting. then i wanted one more, my mum say drink too much too cold for ur body, easy to get sick. good thing i didn.

ya. then this wk got x-country. i doin yeoman. yeah!!! no need to walk the thing. damn boring....

i hope all my fwens will pass the common test...

TIRED

yesterday i watch tv until 3 plus... and surfing on the net. i go see people's blog like chest and jos ang. so updated loh..... anw..... i created this blog yest after i see my fwens blog. i watching this old show call shi gong qi an. some cantonese show. then this is my first entry.

and yest was sec 1 swearing in cermony and si promo. i was there. happy for the sec 1s and also for chest and huan yun and also for fabian. i feel proud for them.

then we went kim san leng and eat. we expected to see lao da and the other cis at s-11. so we went kim san leng to eat. just to avoid them..... fast forward......
yesterday was a fun day la.... a day of reflection. i was quite moody though....
thx fwens.... play bollywood with me and all.